Wednesday 27 November 2013

Busy and Slutty and Working to the 'Plan'

i really am delighted at how Owner has taken me in hand to ensure i am properly trained as Her wife. i recognise that this is a developing and long-term project which requires an ability on my part to demonstrate to Owners satisfaction my continuous commitment to my learning and development in the knowledge that, the further i progress the more challenging, but also rewarding it will become.

Owner and i have been together for just over eight and a half years now. For about eight of those eight and a half years i have been Her submissive partner, and ours has been a Femdom/FLR relationship - we started out vanilla. However, it is also true to say we have both spent a lot of time 'learning the ropes' of our respective roles and i most certainly could and should have been more focused, disciplined and attentive to Her needs.  i had and still have plenty of room for improvement, in particular, to challenge, address and correct some of my patterns of behaviour and push me further, and further into becoming the life partner and submissive Owner deserves. However, over these past few months i believe we have both been making progress towards achieving this outcome whilst, of course, at the same time ensuring that we continue to have fun and enjoy, love and cherish our lives together. Becoming Owners wife and commencing Owners training plan has, i think, started to generate some improvements in my performance and deepened my submission to Her - i'll explain why.

When She took me as Her wife Owner also made it clear that She shared similar aspirations to me - namely that i submit myself more deeply to Her as Her wife and that She in turn exercise greater control over me. However, Owner made it clear that it was up to me to demonstrate to Her that i genuinely wanted to learn, develop, change and progress towards becoming a wife She could be proud of. That wasn't to say that if, somehow or for some reason, i lapsed or we just continued our relationship as we had been before that Owner would no longer love and cherish me. We already had and have a wonderful relationship that is full of fun, love and companionship. However, we both want to deepen my submission to Owner and progress further, much further my role as Her wife and Her position of authority and control.

As well as recognising that i needed to demonstrate to Her that i could still grow and submit myself to Her further Owner also recognised that the changes in attitude, behaviour and approach required of and desired in me would take time if they were to prove lasting and sustained. Accordingly, Owner has established a long-term mechanism whereby each stage in my future development will be 'revealed' incrementally to me at such a time as i have proven to Her that my commitment to develop and progress is both genuine and sustained.  This, in essence was the genesis of what She described as Her 'Plin, Plan, Plon' and which i have just recently commenced Phase II of, having demonstrated to Her satisfaction that i could achieve and sustain the objectives She set out for me in Phase I (objectives which i need to continue delivering ad-infinitum).

The good news though is that i am making and continuing to make progress and demonstrate to Owner that i am indeed capable of further learning, development and progression as Her submissive wife. Some components of the Plan may seem unusual. For instance, learning Spanish. Languages have never been my forte but i have tried off and on and to learn Owners mother tongue, albeit with very limited success before.

We both know though that, whilst we currently live in London, that may not always be the case and Owner should never be in a position where She feels in any way restricted, by a lack of linguistic ability on my part, in where She may wish for us to live in the future. Accordingly, learning the language of Her birth is an important goal for me to achieve. Realistically, i know this will always prove a challenge but progress, albeit somewhat glacial at times, has been noted by Her and Her family which gives me hope that one day i might make Her proud of my efforts.

In terms of domestic work and routine this is entirely my responsibility from morning until night. Owner can, and sometimes does, chose to assist but the working assumption is that any and all cleaning, cooking, tidying, ironing, maintenance, repairs, etc, etc - in short all housework and household tasks and chores are my sole responsibility. In many respects this has been true for a good number of years but the difference now is that everything is to be done to Owners standards, not my own, and everything is to look neat, tidy and spotless at all times. In truth, i enjoy doing housework - the challenge was in re-calibrating my own perception/idea of what 'clean and tidy' look like, but i think i'm finally getting there!

In terms of Owners wider control over me and my own autonomy the pendulum is gradually swinging ever deeper into Owners territory. For years now all my clothes purchases have had first to be approved by Owner and any expenditure by me over a certain level approved by Her. More recently Owner, has introduced exercise regimes, controls if and whether i am permitted alcohol to drink, approves or disapproves what clothes i am permitted to wear that day, has established a set of longer-term tasks and additional skills i am to study and acquire (giving manicures being the most recent) and now expects to always consult with first Her and secure Her approval/consent before i participate in or undertake any activities that would involve me/my time in a manner not related to my service to Her. In addition, we both recognised that i could and should be making more constructive use of any 'free time' and i am now expected to ensure that i fill this constructively through study, additional chore/project completion or attending to Owner. All these are very welcome developments and mark, i think, a notable increase in the degree of control Owner now exerts over me.

At the same time as increasing Her control Owner has continued to push and develop my exhibitionist whore side. Whilst i have become much more shameless  than i once was (as has been documented over the period of this blog) there are still too many instances in which nerves and shyness have got the better of me. Owner continues to work on and challenge me though so that maybe one day i could honestly say i had truly become the complete exhibitionist whore i aspire to be. Meanwhile, Owner treats and regards me as Her fucktoy with my body being used purely for Her enjoyment, pleasure and amusement, not my own. This has actually been the case for most of our relationship, it is a state we both enjoy and, paradoxically, is one that brings me sustained pleasure and joy.

This is how we live our lives together, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. It is a version of Femdom/FLR call it what you will that works for us that we both genuinely enjoy and which enriches our lives and ever deepens our relationship. It can be hard work at times but it is also a huge lot of fun and very rewarding. i genuinely believe that over the course of our relationship i have seen Owner grow, develop and become more confident and assertive. This process has accelerated over the past few months and is a joy to behold and experience at first hand. At the same time, i also feel that i am now on a path of accelerated development as Owners wife. i believe i am becoming more useful and practical to Her, better at serving and meeting Her needs, keeping Her home as She would like whilst further relinquishing and transferring to Owner control over how i live my life.

i am the happiest i have ever been at any time and Owner assures me that She is too. i just hope that i can continue to further learn, develop and make Owner proud.

This has been a rather long post, much longer than i had first intended but i wanted to paint a little portrait of our lives, if only to share my own happiness. In the meantime, and more in keeping with my usual posts, here are some pictures of me up a ladder changing a light bulb

out with the old bulb and in with the new
that should do it
and let there be light
well i did say i was an exhibitionist!
and a short video of me keeping my pussy 'in shape'


2 comments:

Armando said...

Marvelous shots of you at work, I love those socks, and the added shot of your mark and jewelry are just wonderful! Cheers hon, be careful. We don't want a broken servant ^ ^

Poppet Subslut said...

Thanks Armando :)

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