Latest 'Forcedfem' Challenge

Owner has, as mentioned previously, recommenced setting her trainee pet with a series of challenges for him to undertake. Today i had to meet Owner at Kings Cross station in London and walk around the station hall wearing my red high heeled shoes. In an effort to please Owner i also put on some light make-up, my outdoor 'training' collar, a red top to match my heels, trainee pet 'L' badge and red stockings under my fem jeans.

i was nervous as hell before meeting Owner, the station was packed and i couldn't find anywhere discrete to take-off my boots and slip on my heels. However, i was able to find a quiet corner of the station to change my footwear moderately discretely - only those queing for the taxis could see me, and so was fully prepared and dressed for the challenge when Owner greeted me. Owner led me into the station itself and then showed the route that i was to walk, basically i had to do a lap of the station hall. i nervously set off on my trot around the hall being careful to try and ensure i did not slip! or to make eye contact with people just in case i recognised someone!

The picture was taken by Owner at the end of my lap. i think you can tell i was both relieved and excited to have completed my challenge. i particularly like the police officer in the background!

It is our anniversary in a week's time and i am taking Owner to our favourite hotel for the night. Apparently i am to have an audition the next day for Owner that she has entitled my 'Plan 9 For Spoilt Pet'. i have absolutely no idea what this will involve but will do my best and update what it involved and how i got on.

Challenges aside Owner has stated that She has observed an improvement in trainee pet's performance since She issued her ultimatum to me and i was demoted to trainee pet status. For myself, i feel i have now settled into a new routine and am remembering to do all of my household chores and duties, and generally strive to become a much better pet and submissive for Owner. It is wonderful to be back properly serving my Owner again and i think the picture shows just how happy i am to be back being trained. Our relationship is a journey and i have a long way to go and develop as a pet Owner can be truly proud of. But i am enjoying every minute of my re-training as Owners submissive and hope that i can continue to develop and progress in my submission to Her. i truly am a lucky trainee pet!

Holidays

Owner and i have just returned from a fantastic week away in a remote cottage near the sea. i have been trying to improve my performance of late, much needed as the results of my assessment will testify, and Owner seems to have noticed an improvement. i am now offering Owner nightly foot massages and am cleaning on a daily basis and i was really pleased that i continued to undertake these activities for Owner whilst we were on holiday.

Naturally, i still managed to do things wrong and require punishment. As a consequence i spent some time walking around a small market town with Owner whilst wearing japanese clover nipple clamps, which Owner took great delight in pulling and tugging! The funniest incident though occurred on the second to last day of our holiday. As a punishment Owner had me kneeling on all fours on a wooden table in the lounge. i was wearing weighted nipple clamps and had 20 mini clothes pegs attached to my testicles. There was a large butt plug in my 'pussy' and i had just commenced fellating Owners dildo (i was due to remain like this for at least 15 minutes) when there was a sudden knock at the door - bear in mind this was an isolated country cottage we where staying in. i had to make a rapid exit to the bathroom whilst Owner dealt with the caller - it turned out it was the cleaner who had got the date wrong for our departure. i'm just pleased i had remembered to lock the door and that she hadn't just walked straight in!

i am also getting accustomed to being caned once again on a regular basis. Owner currently administers 80 strikes of Her cane per session and we are currently working up towards 100 stokes plus. Owner has also added a new dimension to my punishments, now every time i do something that requires punishing She also removes one of the items of pretty clothing that i like to wear. This is actually a really good incentive to be better behaved as i love to dress up in pretty clothes and am mortified at the prospect of having nothing left to wear.

Owner has also re-commenced her series of humiliating/embarrassing challenges for me. At the airport at the start of our holiday i had to buy some lipstick and nail polish at the airport whilst wearing a tiara and later this week i have to walk the length of a busy London train station in red stiletto heels - which could be interesting!

It's so nice to be back serving my Owner once again, we both feel so much happier and more content. i just hope that one day i can again earn the right to wear Owners collar.

Demoted to trainee pet

Yesterday was the anniversary of my collaring by Owner. However, it was not a cause for celebration as I have been demoted to trainee pet and had my full pet collar removed. Owner is extremely justified in doing this and has rightly commenced a period of intensive re-training of Her pet to get me back performing my expected tasks and duties. To explain why this situation has arisen I need to briefly re-cap the past year of our lives together.

My collaring ceremony on the 8th September 2007 was and is one of the proudest days of my life. Owner had stipulated a series of behaviours and tasks that she expected me, as her pet, to perform for her. Owner had stated that these would be continuously built upon over time to further my total submission to Her in our relationship. For the first 8 months things went extremely well. i was performing my tasks and duties as expected and was relishing my role as Her submissive pet. i was learning and acquiring new skills and was an extremely happy submissive pet.

Then a couple of things happened which, though I do not offer them as an excuse for the subsequent decline in my behaviour and eventual demotion back to trainee pet status, do provide the context for my decline in behaviour. Those things were

• Trying and ultimately failing to sell our flat and buy a house
• Owner commencing a period of intensive study for a course she was doing

Trying to sell the flat meant that house hunting, having to show people around the place, dealing with solicitors and incompetent estate agents etc. The routines that Owner and i had built into our relationship got seriously disturbed and our lives became increasingly stressful as the housing market collapsed whilst we were in the middle of trying to move. Eventually, everything fell through and we’ve decided to stay put for now. However, the experience left us both tired, stressed and emotionally drained.

Owners course meant that She was spending most evenings and weekends studying. Though i helped where I could it did mean that She had little or no time for the fun activities we used to enjoy together. Whilst Owner studied i became restless and distracted. i spent more time on the internet and neglected my duties towards Her. In short, i became a not very good pet at all.

When Owners course ended and the house/flat non-sale/purchase came to an end Owner presented me with a formal notice that my decline in behaviour and performance had been noted and i could either accept re-training along Her lines or be dismissed completely as Her Owned submissive pet. i readily signed the letter. i too had noticed how i had become listless and ill-at-ease with myself. In short, i was as unhappy with life as my Owner was with my behaviour and performance. i recognise that i am only truly happy when serving my Owner and urgently needed help to get me back on track. Owner and i made a list of areas that i had continued to perform Ok in during this period, tasks/activities i had neglected and those i had not even started. This list is detailed below:

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Things I have done
Worn my collar and cuffs at home
Worn pretty clothes and make-up at home
Been in chastity
Saved some money on a regular basis
Cooking for Owner
Washing dishes
Snuggling up with Owner
Relaxing Owner
Cleaning sex toys after use and ensuring we have supplies of condoms/lubricant
Kept toe nails painted
Bent over and made himself available on command
Obtained Owners permission before buying clothes for himself
Worn his tag
Not initiated sex
Greeted Owner at door by kissing her feet
Thank Owner on knees after supervised shower
Wearing high heels at home


Things I have done but not all the time
Updated my journal and diary
Worn make-up and women’s outfits at weekends
Reminded my Owner when I am due a supervised shower
Baked Owner nice cakes/bread/biscuits
Ensured that the washing does not pile-up
Polished Owners shoes
Been Owner sex slave (apart from when pet was ill)
Not drinking alcohol very often (slipped a little lately) – but did ask permission
Reminding Owner when punishment is due
Pleasing Owner orally/manually in bed
Worn his (outdoor collar) when outside the house
Clean bathroom sink/toilet daily
Ensure clothes are neat and tidy
Preparing mini-dungeon on a Friday
Change bed linen every 2 weeks
Not orgasmed without permission


Things I haven’t done at all in past couple of months
Given my Owner a pedicure
Hand-washing Owners underwear
Pleasing Owner sexually using Queening stool
Serving as a foot rest
Licking Owners feet
Learning word/powerpoint
Obtained Owners permission before making purchases over £10
Warmed up Owners side of the bed (not easy to do if giving foot massage as well – need to discuss how best to do this i.e. should pet go to bed before Owner?)
Been kneeling on floor when apologising to Owner
Cleaned the flat completely once a week
Offered my Owner a nightly foot massage
Studied Spanish

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It is now a week since Owner agreed to re-train me. i am already feeling much happier and contented than i was before and my performance is gradually returning to the level expected of me.
Owner too has commenced more regular punishments including regular canings and flogging (arse and testicles) and is again enjoying fucking Her pet.

So, although i am now once again just a trainee pet i am now much, much happier than a few weeks ago and our lives are back on track. It is wonderful to once again be serving Owner as She expects.

Upcoming Appraisal

i have my appraisal with my Owner coming up shortly. About every six months Owner reviews my performance with me and points out areas for improvement, areas of concern and establishes new challenges and development goals for her pet. Unfortunately, i don't think this latest one will go that well as i have slipped back into some bad habits. i have asked Owner to be more severe and demanding with me and to pull me up straight away whenever i fall short of Her expectations. i know that i should not have to ask Owner to do this but i think it will help get my development as her pet back on track. i guess i will find out soon enough.

Re-Commencing Training

For the past 6 months Owner has been extremely stressed and busy with a course She has been doing. However, Her course has now been completed and Owner has advised Her pet that She will be re-commencing his training, especially as he has let things slip a little of late.

i am actually really looking forward to coming under Owners firm control once again. Owner is, of course, right in that with Her preoccupied with other matters i have allowed myself to drift back into some of my old bad habits. It's been quite some time now since Owner last punished and/or publicly humiliated Her pet - something that used to be an almost weekly occurrence. i have felt somewhat lost and without direction and know that i am not truly happy without Owners supervision, guidance, punishment and control.

Housewife Ambitions

For nearly a year now i have entertained a fantasy/ambition of becoming my Owners housewife. i say this for a number of reasons. Firstly, the world of work does not interest me, by this i do not mean that i am lazy (well ok a little!) but rather than i find the routine stifflingly dull and unrewarding. i have many and varied interests in life, some of which take-up a considerable amount of time but none of which is actually 'work' in the paid sense. The downside of these interests though is that i often find that the domestic duties that i should and need to organise, things like cooking, cleaning etc can interfere with and reduce the amount of time i spend with my Owner just the two of us enjoying each others company. i reason that if i had more time during the day by staying at home i could not only get these tasks properly completed and organised ready for when Owner returns home, but that i would also start to keep a much tidier flat as a consequence. i would also have more time to devote to the care of my Owner, and could even learn some new skills via day classes.

As you can tell from my profile picture i also like to wear women's clothing, something that my Owner encourages...infact the sluttier the better! i'll post more about this another time. The point here though is that for work i have to slip back into the clothes that society expects someone of my gender to wear at work - or at least they do in my job. i've wrested before with whether to describe myself as a TV. i'm still not convinced i am. Although i wear women's clothes and make-up i've never gone so far as to try to pass myself off as a woman. For example, although i like to keep myself mostly clean shaven, i don't shave my arms (though i do under my arms). i don't wear a wig or have a woman's hairstyle either. i also know that Owner prefers her pet to look feminised but not so feminised as to actually look like a woman. i sometimes wonder whether it is the views that i know Owner has that has stopped me taking my feminisation further. i did start to 'shape and pluck' my eyebrows about 8 months ago but Owner didn't seem to approve and so i desisted. Part of me is intrigued by the idea of taking my own feminisation further but i would never do so unless such a development were to be approved of and sanctioned by Owner - which i suspect is not that likely.

But i digress! This was supposed to be about why i aspire to be a housewife. Well the above is related because were i to be able to adopt such a role then concerns about what to wear 'at work' would no longer apply. i would be free to wear the clothes and outfits that i feel most comfortable and most myself in and which Owner either buys for me or gives me permission to purchase for myself.

i also feel strangely that, career-wise, i have achieved all that i set out to do back many years ago when i started. i can't see any way that i will progress further and am terrified of the prospect of just doing the same old thing for another 30ish years! God how dull! Owner, in contrast, continues to develop and grow in her job and with her skills. She often underates just how much talent she packs, but i feel sure that great opportunities still lie ahead of her should she wish to pursue them. Whereas, for me, work-wise i feel my own best is now behind me. i'm comfortable with this thought but not with the idea of still doing the same old thing. At home though i could develop further my own skills and interest in cooking, gardening, home care etc. i know this is a selfish thought and some might argue that i should be the one doing all the work and supporting my Owner, enabling her to have more free time to relax and enjoy life. i would love this too as time apart from her is horrible. But i know she also enjoys some (at least) aspects of her work. Freelance would be maybe be ideal.

Unfortunately, though the economics of one of us not working or earning something do not stack-up. So being a housewife will just have to remain a dream, albeit a pleasant, wistful one.

Helloooo and welcome

Welcome all. i'm just starting out with this blog so it may take a while before it gets some momentum going. However, the intention over time is to write and document my thoughts and experiences of living as a submissive pet/slut with my wonderful Owner.

The blog will attempt to chart my thoughts and experiences and to document my life. Owner and i have been living together now for a couple of years and in that period have tried to develop our own version of a Female-led relationship. i was collared by my Owner just over a year ago. As you can see from the image in my profile i am also a cross-dresser, i love top wear pretty outfits and Owner encourages me to do so, infact, Owner buys all of my clothes - or at least has the final say in what clothes i am allowed to buy for myself.

Another thing about me is that Owner likes to keep me (and i confess i enjoy it myself) in regular chastity. i wear a CB3000 most of the time with occasional periods of release when allowed such by Owner. i am one of, i suspect a growing band of men, who rather surprisingly discovered that their 'sex-life' improved dramatically courtesy of being placed into chastity. i've not had 'regular' sex for over two years but do have an extremely enjoyable sex life with Owner - one that is focussed on Her pleasure and satisfaction. That said, i am extremely lucky in that Owner is a great fan of Her strap-on, as i am too. In my experience there is nothing that makes me hornier or more aroused than being 'fucked' by my Owner.

i'm also a pain slut and am especially fond of nipple torture in all its wonderful forms, together with CBT. Owner is also a fan of and believer in domestic discipline as well as forced feminisation and public humiliation....more on that subject in future posts. Owner also loves tickling her pet, something i'm not that keen on!

Some others things about me, and which i am sure to blog about in future. i love wildlife and have a wildlife garden i am creating. i also love cooking - something that i've developed a great interest in since meeting Owner. In fact, my ambition in life would be to become a housewife but sadly that option is not economically feasible at this moment in time. However, i would love to just keep house for my Owner and be at home for Her at all times...maybe one day!

Oh, and i love to cycle and have a keen interest in history, politics and current affairs. You could say i try to be an ethical slut.

Anyway, that really is me in a nutshell. i will try to keep this blog going but before signing off would just like to take a moment to thank all of the other submissive males out there who too have chosen to let others share/explore their world via the web. They will never know how important that have been for me...but from one who at first thought he was odd and alone until he discovered there were many others out there...thank you!