We're Back - and a Milestone Passed

Owner and i are, sadly, back from our trip to South West Finland. We both had a wonderful time and would thoroughly recommend that part of the world to anyone looking for a holiday. The archipelago is stunning with its thousands of islands, only a small fraction of which are inhabited. There are also lots of gorgeous little beaches and woodlands/forests to walk through and bogs to traverse (mostly on wooden planks thankfully). There is also the lovely city of Turku to explore together with the fabulous old wooden houses in Rauma further up the coast (see images further down).

Owner left the holiday planning to me this time and congratulated me on my choice of holiday location and accommodation. i was a little anxious as normally it is Her that chooses and arranges such things but at the time She was going through a stressful period as She was changing jobs and so instructed me to make all the arrangements. i was relieved when She expressed Herself to be more than satisfied with the place i had chosen.

By the time it finally came for us to head off on our holidays i too was really quite stressed, a combination of trying to sort things out helping my elderly father move home and sort out all of his affairs (he has dementia), together with a busy and pressurised period at work. As a result of this Owner decided that i needed a complete rest and so whilst we were away i was excused from doing chores. She did all the cooking, relegating me to simply doing breakfast and cleaning dishes after meals and the driving. We actually clocked up fewer kilometers than we often do on our holidays with the hire car clocking in at a little shy of 1,500km traveled over the 14 day period. i was also even allowed a few drinks whilst we were away, although obviously not when driving, and even got to choose what to order from a restaurant menu rather than have Owner decide for me. In short, She was still in charge but decided to give me a lot more freedom than i would normally expect.  

Whilst we were away Owner commented how nice it would be if She were to have a younger sub who could do all the in-holiday cooking and the driving for us allowing us both a bit of downtime. Obviously, that person would need to cover their own expenses, even better would be for them to pay for the privilege of being with us! So, if anyone is reading this and thinks they'd make a good candidate as Owner's submissive assistant then please do drop me a line.

Anyway, back to our time away. Owner made clear that my 'time off' was strictly time limited and that too much of it would undo any of the good that a bit of R&R might achieve. i would be expected to resume my duties on our return. In truth, i also found that i missed my routines and chores. There is something therapeutic about doing them. i also missed the control i normally feel Owner exerting over me on a daily basis. Of course it was still in place but Her 'leash' was a lot less tight that it normally is.

Now that we have returned i am back to my usual routines and chores. In a way it is like slipping on a pair of comfortable shoes. It feels familiar and 'right'. The holiday was wonderful but, as Owner pointed out, too much relaxation is not good for me at all.

We returned late Saturday. The following day, Sunday, saw the passing of a little milestone in my life. Yes, yesterday Sunday 4th April 2023 was exactly one year, 365 days since i last had an orgasm of any type, accidental or forced, ruined or non-ruined. That last orgasm having occurred on the same date in 2022. No semen has leaked or shot out of my little caged clit since and i am all the hornier and happier for that fact.

i suspect a good many readers will struggle with the idea that being kept denied like this is something to aspire to but for me it definitely is the case. i love the mental state this leaves me in. The constant, low level, ache for a release that never comes. My orgasmic desires have gone. Even when released from my cage for cleaning i feel no desire at all to touch or play with my clit. My chastity device is not there as a means of preventing me from masturbating as that would not happen even were it not in place.  Rather, to me it serves a psychological and practical purpose and function. It reinforces the point that my clit serves no sexual function or purpose, either to me or to Owner. It has not been inside Her pussy for almost fifteen years and i cannot now imagine a future circumstance in which it ever might be so allowed again. In effect, i became a born again virgin in my late thirties.

Owner used to permit me to cum quite often. Sometimes i would just get over excited and frantically ask Her if i might be allowed to, to which She would invariably say yes. Other times She would quite deliberately make me cum with Her hand, pumping my little swollen appendage until it popped. Then one day She discovered that if She beat me hard on my 'labia plums' She could make me climax in a manner quite unlike anything i had experienced before. The experience was so overwhelmingly intense (going from acute pain to acute pleasure) that i would literally howl as i exploded. Owner began to restrict how i orgasmed to using this method alone. At the same time She also used such experiences to reinforce my status as Her slut, telling me loudly and repeatedly what a whore i was and to cum like a whore as She beat one earth-shattering climax after another out of me. Such occasions served to further my growth and development as Her slut wife by teaching me to behave like a whore. It also led me to acquire even more of a taste for semen that i already had as She would scoop up my resultant mess and feed it to me after each orgasmic explosion. And i created a LOT of mess.

Such spectacular releases were, from my perspective, wonderful to experience in the moment but always then led to an inevitable drop in my performance as Her submissive. They also always left me feeling a little disappointed that i had climaxed. Part of me longed to be left horny, frustrated and denied. i have always felt that my own orgasm serves only to distract me from my true purpose, namely to pleasure Owner. For Her part i believe Owner enjoyed making me climax this way and seeing what a whore She could make me become. However, it also gradually became apparent that so successful had this 'training' been that this behavior could be coaxed from me without the accompanying sexual 'motivation'. i slowly became more 'whore-like' whenever She wanted me to as i overcame my inhibitions and shyness and learnt to embrace the slut She expected of me, and which deep-down i truly am.

It no longer required me to climax hard in order for me to connect with the slut i am.  i developed, evolved and grew into behaving like a slut without the need for accompanying orgasmic 'highs' to unlock that side of me.

i have now been developed and trained by Owner to a point where the absence an orgasm of any type for a full year seems like the logical next step in my progression as Her sex toy and slut wife. i have no desire to have an orgasm and it now feels quite natural that i should not have been granted any this past year. Of course i still get horny, my 'natural state' is actually one in which i feel almost constantly semi-aroused. My breasts and nipples have become increasingly  sensitive and love to be touched and caressed as too do my labia plums.  My 'pussy' also opens up at the slightest touch or caress and loves nothing more than to be stretched wide and stuffed deep. 

For Her part Owner regularly fondles, gropes and caresses my buttocks and strokes the entrance of my pussy or grabs and squeezes my labia plums. The nipple chain She got me also leaves my tits in a state of constant, swollen arousal and She will often touch or caress them. When She uses me for sex She still touches, beats and caresses me in a way that gets my clit excited and aroused but now She does so only to tease and excite, not to make or force me to cum. Whenever it looks like i might start enjoying myself a little too much She stops and ensures that my focus and sexual energies are on Her and not myself.

Perhaps i have also already experienced my last ever orgasm? It is something i have long fantasised about and, to an extent, craved. To be kept permanently denied until the day i die. After all, my sole sexual purpose is to pleasure Owner in a manner of Her choosing and to be Her human sex toy.

i have no idea whether or not Owner will make me cum again. She might do but then equally, She might not. All i do know is that i have come to realise that the longer i am kept denied the happier and the better person i become. Just as i love my born again virgin, cock-less, chaste, feminised, slut self so too do i have i come to realise that the longer i go without experiencing an orgasm the more wonderfully, frustratedly aroused i become. To be kept in such a state by Owner is a true privilege. i am a very lucky slutty wife indeed!

Anyway, as promised some pics from the last days of our trip to Finland 

Rauma church

Rauma old town

Owner leading the way

More Baltic Bikini Bathing

Owner and i detoured away from the Finish mainland and archipelago to head out to the Åland Islands, a Swedish-speaking but Finnish owned archipelago located between both countries in the Baltic Sea. We flew from Turku on the Finnish mainland to the islands capital, Mariehamn. It was a bumpy flight of about 30 minutes but the scenery was stunning.

Mariehamn itself is very pretty and bustling and feels more Swedish than Finnish with its timber-clad houses and avenues lined with Linden trees. It is located on a peninsula that you can walk all the way around and has a myriad of little beaches. 

The temperature was a little shy of thirteen degrees celsius, just about warm enough for a tart like me to want to strip-off into their bikini and go for a dip. The sea itself was...erm...well pretty cold as you can tell from one of the pictures below. But as the video proves i did swim and didn't spend all the time posing and looking windswept on a bench.

Mariehamn also has a selection of good restaurants so Owner and i were able to enjoy a delicious meal out together. Anyway, here are some pictures of me continuing to try and get my bikini pose perfected

the windswept slut look

And then going for a dip in the freezing waters of the ocean

it's a bit chuffin cold

And here are some pictures of Mariehamn itself

Readers who are bored of countless photos of our travels may be relieved to know that, sadly, our Finnish adventure comes to an end in a few days time. But, we are already planning our next holiday later in the year!

18 Years -Wowsers

On the 31st May 2005 Owner and i met face to face for the first time ever. The location was Bond Street tube station and i was immediately struck by Her large, beautiful eyes, long hair and the size of the flares on Her jeans (She was big into flared denim back then).

We went for a pizza and talked and talked.  Both of us were in the process of divorcing and had met up online a month or two before we met in person. After that day we regularly met up for drinks and giggles but simply just as 'friends'. Believe it or not i am by nature quite shy and although i really liked Owner i was far too bashful to make any kind of move. 

Eventually, in October of that year She tired of waiting and snogged me on the station at London Charing Cross. Our relationship proper then kicked off. It started as a vanilla one but then i wrote Her a long letter inviting Her to move in with me (we had our own separate flats) and, more importantly, asking if I could submit to Her. Ours was the first and only Femdom/FLR relationship either of us has had. We continue to learn and evolve in our relationship every day.

I really struggle to remember what my life was like before i met Owner. She has brought so much fun, joy, happiness and pleasure into my life. I hope we our celebrating this day for decades to come as we grow old disgracefully.

Thank you Owner,  you are the best.

Frisky Frolics in Finland

Did i mention that the place Owner and i are staying in here in Finland has a jacuzzi on the deck patio? Pretty much every day we have been here has found Owner and i in our respective swimsuit and bikini floating around amidst the bubbles. It is a wonderful way to spend some time, not to mention that the jets of warm water feel amazing as they pummel my pussy through the thin fabric of my bikini bottoms!😀

Well, yesterday it felt even better as  as Owner stripped me of my bikini top and bottom when we were in the water and proceeded to then lightly spank my swollen 'labia'. Obviously, the minute She did so my thighs automatically parted as little waves of pleasure surged through me, waves that grew even more pleasurable as She tugged on the chain suspended from my pierced nipples, causing me to become even more aroused. My little clit began to swell in its cage in excited delight.

With yours truly feeling excitable Owner then positioned Herself in a seated position at one end of the jacuzzi and pulled me over towards Her until i was lying naked over Her lap in the warm water. By raising Her hips slightly She was able to push my bum up and clear of the water whereupon, still holding my nipple chain tight with one hand, She administered a light outdoor spanking with Her free hand on my naked butt. It was a lovely way to start the day before we set off exploring.

However, lovely as it was it was not a patch on the manner in which She started my day this morning. After we'd had breakfast Owner beckoned me back to bed, instructed me to strip naked and then, once again, started to lightly spank my bottom and pull on my tit chain. It had the, i suspect, intended affect of making me wet and aroused. It would appear Owner enjoyed tormenting me like that too for when She took off Her panties and placed the fabric of the crotch against my nose, i inhaled the wonderful fresh scent of Her sex.

Owner positioned me flat on my stomach and then took the solid rubber 'evil bat' paddle i had brought with us and administered a good solid spanking on my backside and a lighter one to my bits. i had forgotten just how effective this rubber paddle is and was soon writhing and squirming on the bed. My bottom quickly started to colour up as you can see from the picture below

the 'evil bat' paddle

Owner tired of spanking my butt with the paddle after a bit and wandered off into the kitchen to look for something, leaving me face down on the bed. What She was seeking i had no idea but i was soon to discover.

She returned with a rubber basting implement for covering the surface of pies and other dishes but quickly found another, better use for it, in the former of a plum/testicle beater. Instructing me to get on all fours and to part my legs slightly She used Her newly found implement to great effect, striking it against my exposed swollen labia until i started to squirm, then striking them some more. Next She told me to turn over and deployed the same implement against my now already slightly sensitive nipples which were already aroused from having had the nipple chain pulled hard as She spanked me earlier.

'Would you like me to sit on your face?' Owner asked. By this point She had re-positioned Herself astride my derriere and was grinding Her pussy against my newly warmed buttocks.

What sort of a question was that was my immediate thought. Of course i would, i would like nothing better. i conveyed my delight at the suggestion and watched as Owner fetched Her vibrator then squatted down astride my face and pleasured Herself within millimeters of my nose with Her toy. i needed no instruction as to what was expected from me and immediately set about worshiping Her wonderful anus with my tongue. Licking Owner's arse whilst She brings Herself off is truly one of my life's great pleasures and privileges. It is always wonderful help bring Her pleasure and today was no exception. i loved looking up through the fine thicket of Her pubic hair and watching Her climax as i feasted on Her backside. All too soon and it was over. Owner got up to shower and change leaving me aroused but contentedly denied.

There was, however, one final bit of excitement in store for me. Today was a mostly cloudy day with some rain forecast in the afternoon. Rather than head off on a hike or go to a beach we decided instead to visit an old local stately home in the morning and then head to a nearby spa resort hotel in the afternoon to make use of their pool facilities. The prospect of the latter made me nervous but also excited as the only swim wear i had with me were the two pairs of bikinis, one pink and sparkly and the other blue and frilly. i decided to be sensible and bring my blue bikini and not the pink one for what was to be my first ever very public appearance in a spa pool wearing a bikini!

We had no idea how busy the facilities would be and so i was a little apprehensive upon arrival, more so on being instructed to head to the men's changing room and discovering it to be an open plan space with nowhere to really discretely slip out of my bra and lilac lace panties and change into my bikini. It was made more nerve wracking still as i was obviously also wearing my pink micro chastity device. But, in the company of a couple of naked and near naked Finnish men i stripped off and changed into my bikini and then traipsed through to the pool area.

On arrival i was greeted by the sight of a large pool and a couple of hot tubs/pools and a bunch of couples splashing and lounging about, as well as some kids. i bit the bullet and padded across the tiled floor, avoiding people's gaze whilst staring at my painted toes as i walked, and eased myself a little shyly into the pool. Of Owner there was no sign.

After a minute or so in the water i plucked up some courage to swim a couple of lengths until Owner emerged and i swam over to join Her. By that point i had started to feel a little less self-conscious in my bikini. Owner and i plonked ourselves into one of the hot tubs alongside some other couples and then spent the next hour moving from one warm pool to another and then back again to the main pool to cool off and so on. i ceased feeling self-conscious and swam and splashed and walked around quite happily in my bikini. i did feel a bit awkward heading back into the men's changing room later in my bikini to dry off and putting my panties and bra back on again in front of some real men who were also getting changed. But nobody said anything or remarked about me (not that i would have understood a word if they had!), nor did i really even get many odd looks in the pool. All in all, i think my first ever public pool bikini swim went well and Owner and i both got to enjoy a lovely time together at the spa.

Here i am poolside in my blue bikini

and this is me enjoying myself in the pool

By the time we were back outside and walking back to the hire car i was feeling quite proud of how i had got on.

But, enough (again) of me. i leave you with some more pictures taken on our Finnish adventure as i know that a number of readers are appreciating the lovely landscapes around here.

we came across a seafront house with its own float plane!

Tomorrow we head off to an island located mid-way between Finland and Sweden which we'll be staying on for a few days. It is part of the Åland Islands which is actually a de-militiarised zone and a rare (very) example of a successful League of Nations agreement. The place has been peaceful for over a hundred years. Hopefully Owner and i won't disturb the peace too much!

Water, Forests, Rocks and Bogs

Owner and i continue our sojourn in Finland. We have been before, both up beyond the Arctic circle in the far North of the country and to the capital, Helsinki. However, this is our first time out in the south west of Finland, to the Finish Archipelago and the second-city of Turku. It is a great place with some lovely landscapes to go walking in and lakes and seas to swim in, even if they might be a bit on the cold side!

Before we arrived we were both quite stressed with one thing and another but we are both now feeling totally relaxed, in my case perhaps a little too relaxed for my own good. Chores have been put on hold until we get back and Owner has already treated me to a couple of relaxed evening of drinks in Her company. 

She has also spoilt me with some new items of clothing, comprising a pair of new lilac knickers and a wonderful black and white checked dress. i had an opportunity to model these, together with a pair of hold-up stockings She got for me just before we left for Finland, this evening.

The property we are renting is on the edge of a small settlement and backs out onto a woodland. About one hundred feet or so from the back porch are a couple of large rocks that make for a perfect stage (in my view) on which to do a little photo shoot. The rocks are just off a path through the woods and overlook a small row of houses but we figured that we could get away with me clambering up and posing in the new dress and underwear Owner bought for me. You can see some of the resulting pictures below

posing a top a rock

Ooops, i appear to be becoming undone!

shamelessly showing off my new knickers

i haven't just spent my time posing on top of rocks, however, i have also been keeping up with my daily exercises despite being on holiday

morning exercises on the veranda

And spending time enjoying the sun;

But i haven't been sitting about in the sunshine all the time. We've also got in a hike on which, much to my disappointment, no moose were spotted

poppet on a plank

And also got to interact with some old public art in Turku

"This here poppet says he will blow us both for free" :)

But that is far, far too much about me. i did say i was getting way too relaxed and comfortable! Here are some more images from Finland

one of the numerous inter-island ferries we have been on

Turku Cathedral

Turku Castle

Owner and i are still not quite at the half-way mark on our holiday here in Finland and blog readers may want to skip the next post or two if you are sick of the sight of me interacting with the natural environment or random sculptures in this part of Europe as i can't promise that there won't be more posts from here.

Bathing Baltic Babes

So Owner and i arrived safely here in Finland on Saturday to start our summer holidays. We are staying in South West Finland, close to a city called Turku and the Finnish Archipelago. Despite the northern location the weather has been surprisingly warm with the temperature nudging 24c today. Normally Owner suffers when it gets warm but with places to go close to the coast that offer shade and cool breezes She has managed to keep Her cool. She even ventured into the cold waters of the Baltic Sea (well, technically the Gulf of Bothnia), which still freezes over in winter in these parts. In fact the coastline here looks much more like a lakeside than the sea with reeds and wildlife fringing the cool, near arctic waters.

Of course, me being me, at the first sight of sunshine i had stripped off into my bikini. i actually brought two pairs with me, one to use in the jacuzzi/tub on the deck of the AirBnB we are staying at and the other for the beach. One pair is blue and the other pink. Of course i chose the pink to wear out in public :)

Now the million dollar question. Have i swum in the sea? Yes! i even have a video to prove it (see further down). It was cold enough to cause my clit to retreat even further into its cage but not so cold as to trigger hypothermia. Actually, the water was surprisingly mild.

And the second question, was i seen in public in my bikini? Again yes. Although super quiet there were a few people about so Finns have indeed got to see an unusual, previously unknown, species of slutty moomin frolicking about in a pink bikini, including a group of school girls who giggled as they passed me sunning myself in my bright pink two-piece by the water. Actually, a moomin is quite an appropriate descriptor as pictures of me in my bikini serve only to emphasise how much i need to lose my belly.

Anyway, enough of me rambling, here are some pictures, first of Owner and i at the beach then some of the scenery here in SW Finland.

Owner and i at the beach

beach slut 1

Beach slut 2

Beach slut 3

Testing the water

the pontoon i swam to....what, don't believe me?

The above video shows a very rare slut moomin (aka poppet) swimming in a pink bikini.

The beaches and scenery here are quite beautiful and Owner and i have only really just started to explore. Here are a couple of examples

i know it looks like a lake, but this is the sea

Right, that's it for now. As you can see, we are greatly enjoying our Finnish escape and hopefully there will be many more adventures to come whilst we are here.