One Year Of Orgasm Denial

Today marks 365 days since my last orgasm of any sort i.e. full or ruined. Whoop, whoop - go me! 🙌🎉🎉

Yep, Monday the 5th of May 2025 was the last time my little clit made an unfortunate mess. It was a Bank Holiday and Owner instructed me to 'cum like a slut' as i masturbated whilst greedily gagging on Her 'cock'. You can read all about it in this blog post recounting the day here. Twelve months later and my little labia plums remain un-emptied. i truly hope that i am kept in this state of denial for the rest of my life. 

i have, as always, my Owner to thank. i am so incredibly grateful to Her for keeping me in this most wonderful denied state, one that feels so appropriate for Her submissive slut and wife. Thank you Owner for these past 12 months of denial - you are the best!

i know that to some readers the idea of being grateful for not being permitted to cum will sound a little strange perhaps extreme even, i also know there are other readers that similarly long to be kept orgasm free by their owners (you know who you are!)

Being kept in this state of long-term denial does not mean i am no longer interested in sex, quite the opposite! It keeps me in state of semi-permanent but frustrated arousal and desire. Exactly how a slut should be. i crave Owners body, yearn to feel Her big fat 'cock' inside of me, love to dress sluttily in the hope of being groped and molested. The longer i stay denied the hornier i get. 

However, despite such arousal i have no desire to cum or even play with myself  'down there'. Of course, being in chastity largely (not completely) removes any such possibility but when Owner and i were in Japan i was unlocked the whole time. Owner did not want the faff of having to lock and unlock me each time we took a flight (not just there and back - we had some internal flights too). Not once in that time did the thought ever occur to me to try to touch myself. i confess it did feel strange and slightly unsettling seeing my clit in the mirror - one of the things i like about being in chastity is the fact that it means i cannot see, let alone touch, my clit. i don't want rid of it, but i would rather not see it - i have a complex relationship with my clit :)

i also had the unusual experience, whilst unlocked in Japan, of waking to the feel the fabric of the bedding caress and tease my clit when it awoke free and aroused each morning. However, i simply lay still until that feeling passed. In short, even unlocked i had no desire to touch myself or be touched in a way that might trigger an accident. i would once have found the desire to masturbate irresistible, not any more. Owner has trained me to focus only on Her sexual pleasure and never cum without Her permission, now i have lost all desire to ejaculate at all.

Orgasms are intense but transitory feelings whereas denial, denial is special. It is ever present. Yes it waxes and wanes at times but it never goes. It is always there, a constant throb, an ache. a yearning and a desire. It creates a state of mind that allows your inner slut to thrive, entices it out to play, to be opened up and become a toy, an object whose sole goal and purpose (in my case) is my Owners pleasure. It makes me want to wear outfits that reveal and invite exploring, groping hands. It makes me want to spread my legs and offer myself to be penetrated and stretched. It makes being caned, whipped, spanked even electrocuted something to crave and yearn for. Denial makes me relish every fresh glass of piss Owners hands me to drink, makes me want nothing more than to plunge my tongue deep inside Her delicious anus or bury my face between Her fabulous tits (i am actually quite envious of Owners breasts!).

More practically and usefully it is this same frustrated desire that motivates me to complete my chores, strive to become a better and more obedient wife to Owner, to serve Her and become a better person in doing so. It motivates me to learn new skills, become more useful and improve my service to Owner.

Orgasm denial feels like the natural state of things for me as Owners submissive slut, human sex toy and wife. My focus is Her, my pleasure comes from Her pleasure. Now a year has passed and i want nothing more than to continue in this state of denial for ever.

However, i also know that is not for me to decide. It is Owner, not me, who will decide if and whether i will ever orgasm again. The mere fact of knowing (as She does) that i hope not to may be enough to make Her decide to force me to cum. i can only hope that She decides not to do that.

Just as it only became apparent years later what a significant year in my life 2010 was - the year i became a born-again-virgin, the year, aged 40 that my clit was allowed inside Owner for the last ever time - so too do i hope that i might one day look back to that bank holiday Monday in May 2025 and come to realise that it too was another milestone in my development.  Only time will tell. All i can do is express my deepest gratitude to my wonderful Owner for having kept me orgasm free for 365 days. i love and adore you.

Sakura In My Kimono

I was super lucky. Owner took me for an outdoor photoshoot in a small park by lake Toya in Hokkaido prefecture in Japan. I was dressed in the kimono outfit that She bought for me. We got to enjoy cherry blossom (Sakura) with me dressed in my pretty outfit. Thank you Owner. 

Owner also shot this little video of me in the park. We both had great fun with this little photoshoot.

Greetings From Japan

Owner and i are greatly enjoying our holiday in Japan. We started off spending a few days exploring Tokyo and Mount Fuji before we headed by bullet train to Nagoya. We based ourselves there and explored Nagoya itself and also Kyoto, Kobe, Nara and Osaka - all easily accessible by train from Nagoya.

Next, we flew from Nagoya to Sapporo in Hokkaido then moved onto Otaru on the coast which is where we are now. We will then fly back to Tokyo for a final 36 hours in the city before we head home.

The trip has been amazing. A beautiful country and great cities and so, so many cute and adorable things to buy!

Owner bought me a kimono outfit (see below) and a super cute kwaii skirt. i have also come to realise that my preferred personal fashion style is to dress as teenage Japanese girls do - short skirts and super cute accessories attached to their bags. How i would love to be them...sigh!

We also experienced an earthquake in Sapporo that woke us at 5.30am when the whole room physically shook.

Anyway. Here are some pictures.  First ones took of me dressed in the kimono outfit She got for me:

And here are a few random scenes from our travels so far around Japan 

Owner also bought me this cute pair of panties

Owner is still hoping to do an outdoor photoshoot of me in the Kimono.  She had hoped to do one in Kyoto but heavy rain thwarted that plan. Hopefully an opportunity will present itself.

That's it from us for now. 

Teaching An Old Wife (me) New Tricks

Owner has always been of the view that, as Her submissive wife, it is important that i develop a range of useful skills as befits Her housewife. Accordingly, over the year i have been sent on courses ranging from sewing and massage techniques, through to how to give pedicures, dress making and flower arranging. Suffice to say, each one has been fun and instructive and provided me with an opportunity to acquire a new skill.

Such training also benefits me. It is, after all, important to keep the brain active and to keep learning new things, especially as you get older.

Which brings me to yesterday. Owner met up with a friend from work for lunch and then went to the theatre with her. Whilst she was doing that i started my day with housework before then heading out to attend a lesson that Owner booked me onto, learning Ikebana - the Japanese art of floral arrangement. When She booked me the lesson for me, Owner reminded me how much She values Her wife (me) having a good set of useful and practical skills for Her home.

It was fun to get to learn a new skill and very timely too, given that on Wednesday Owner and i fly out to Tokyo for the start of our Japanese adventure. This was my humble creation: 

Owner declared it to be very pretty when i showed it to Her later.

My lesson completed Owner then allowed me to meet up with Her and Her friend for a drink. The three of us had an enjoyable evening, Her friend even observed how She had noted how well Owner had trained me - this a reference to the times when She had observed me placing fresh cups of coffee by Owners side during the day whilst she and Owner were on a work-related Teams call and that Owner has told Her how i do the housework etc at home. It was an innocent enough observation but still, it made me smile and glad to have had my service to Owner recognised by another. It was definitely a proud moment.

Of course, there are also more practical domestic skills that i get to deploy everyday, one of which is sweeping the floors each morning whilst Owner is out on Her early morning walk. She always checks in on me via the surveillance camera. This was the sight She saw earlier this week:

Busy sweeping the floor as observed by Owner via Her surveillance camera

Today Owner and i start packing for our trip to Japan. As previously noted there will be no monthly outdoor challenge this month as i will be out of the country. However, i hope to be able to bring you some updates from our journey through the land of the rising sun in due course.

Easter Escape

Owner and i are just back from a lovely, long Easter weekend break in Arundel. We enjoyed just having some time together, ambling about having coffees, drinks and meals together and going for walks. It was the perfect antidote to what has been a busy and quite stressful period for us both with work.

It was also an opportunity to break out my Easter bunny outfit. Owner also got creative with Her photo editing skills. This was me on Easter Sunday in the rental property we were staying in just off the High Street 

Bimbo bunny out in the wild :)

And a couple of Owner's creative Easter-themed edits

And the two of us enjoying a drink together on Saturday

We hope that readers also had a relaxing and chilled Easter break.

Happy Birthday Owner

My wonderful Owner celebrated Her birthday this week with a breakfast of cake and presents. Sadly, we both had to work so it was not exactly a relaxing day for Her. She also was not feeling 100% so the plans i had to take Her to dinner ended up being shelved.

However, all is not lost. This weekend we are spending the weekend away in the pretty market town of Arundel in Sussex replete with castle, listed buildings and nature reserve. It also boasts a number of decent restaurants and so i will be taking Owner out for a belated birthday meal there instead. Who knows what else we might get up to!

Happy birthday Owner! You are the love of my life and the centre of my world.

Another Discombobulating week

The past week has been another busy and disruptive one for Owner and i. My work took me, with Owners' blessing, to Barcelona for three days to a conference that i was speaking at. 

Readers might be surprised to read that i spent such time away from Owner given how, under normal circumstances, it is agreed between us that i am forbidden to stay away from Her overnight unless i am needing to visit family. However, this occasion was an approved exception.

As regular readers will know Owner is Spanish.  She has a flat in Spain as well as the one in London and She would like to return there to live one day, with me at Her side. We regularly travel to and from Spain. For years now i have been trying to get beyond just a rudimentary knowledge of the Spanish language. Owner rightly expects my language ability to improve.

Accordingly, when the offer to speak at this conference came up Owner stated that She agreed to my attending. She noted that it would be an opportunity to further practice my Spanish and develop some potentially useful contacts so that i might be able to work in Spain if required.

It was a successful, albeit intense, few days. However, i did get a brief opportunity to see some of the city outside of the conference venue. At the risk of this becoming more of a travel than an FLR-focussed blog, here are some pictures:

La Sagrada Familia

Design Museum and Torre Glories

Torre Glories (or as i refer to it - the pencil vibrator) at night

Parc de la Ciutedella

Street in the old quarter

Jardins Fontsere i Mestre

i was quite tired when i returned home late Friday night as was Owner who has also had a busy week at work. We were both delighted to be reunited again but are having a quiet time this weekend to try and re-charge in preparation for the week ahead, which is a significant one for Owner as it will be Her birthday.

So this week, just like the previous, has been a busy one work-wise for the two of us. Meanwhile, the Trump initiated fuck-up in the Middle East, and its consequences for the region and wider-world, has also made it difficult to focus on service and submission and avoid the constant distraction of the depressing news.