'Twas The Night Before Halloween

Spine chilling and horrifying sights, sensations and scenes have been experienced in Owner's home today, and no i am not talking about the ghoulish vision of me drifting about early this morning sweeping and mopping the floors. Nor am i talking about the sight of me standing over my simmering 'cauldron; cooking chicken and chorizo paella for lunch. i am not even speaking of the ghastly Jack O' Lanterns that Owner and i carved this afternoon (incidentally - can you tell whose is whose?)

which was carved by me and which by Owner?

No dear reader. i am speaking of something more awful, an unspeakable abomination. Come closer, closer, let me whisper it in your ear.

"This afternoon i danced to the tune of Britney Spear's '[Hit me] Baby one more time'

For those of a nervous disposition i urge and implore you to look away now, read and look no further. But for those of you who dare, who can look at true horror in the face and smile, who are not offended at the sight of a fifty-two year old pretending to be a teen and dancing really, really badly. Then dear reader, i present to you, 'Hit me Owner one more time'

Your mercifully motionless protagonist before the true horror began

And then the music started and out stepped THIS apparition, moving and miming like only the living dead can

Dear god, please make it stop! But no, it goes on, and that stomach (in my defence i had just eaten a very large bowl of paella)

and on, and on, horror unrelenting

If you have read to here let me assure you that no horror or sight you see this coming night of the dead will be quite as terrifying as the sight of me dancing (or trying to). But, as i hope you can see, a lot of fun was had trying to.

i am so sorry Britney, after all you have been through you did not deserve to have your song treated like this.

Happy Halloween everyone from Owner and i