The Trial - An Update

After my initial faltering start i continue to progress well (i think) in the Trial period that Owner has set me to establish whether or not i am ready to be taken further under Her control. The Trial was originally due to just run for the month of February but was extended by a week into March on account of me accruing two punishable misdemeanours in early February. i am pleased to say that no further such reasons to be punished by Owner have been committed by me.

There is, however, obviously still some time to go and plenty of opportunity for me to still fuck things up! i really hope that i do not and that Owner considers me worthy of being more tightly controlled by Her.

Talking of Owner. This past week has been a difficult one for Her. The frozen shoulder She currently has in Her right shoulder has got worse, causing Her considerable pain and discomfort and also creating other problems in Her back. i have tried to help by providing deep tissue massages on request, but to only limited effect. Accordingly, on Thursday morning we both trooped over to a specialist physio for Her to receive a second cortisone injection into Her shoulder. Hopefully that will help tide Her over until Her shoulder starts to naturally unlock, which eventually it will. The problem with these injections though is that, at first, they make the situation worse so Owner spent much of the day in considerable discomfort. Today has, however, been better for Her.

As for me. i have been getting on with my chores, studies, exercises, seeking permission to speak etc and weekly tasks, including, at one point, acting as Owners footrest.

Owners' feet resting on my bum

i also, once again, had an opportunity to show off my new skirt to a few visitors to Owners flat. Namely, the plumber who came around to quote for some work, as well as to some post, parcel and grocery delivery people.  Then today i took delivery of some hire tools to use this weekend (sanding). This saw me stood outside talking to a very tall, bearded and blonde Norse God type guy, followed by our downstairs neighbour, in same said short skirt with fishnet stockings.

This is what i was wearing

i have come to really love this skirt. It is the perfect length.

Tonight, Owner felt sufficiently better for Her to electro torture me once again using a combination of the electro-clit device, zapper and electric clamps on my clit, pussy, buttocks and breasts. 

Teet shocking in progress

Tomorrow i will be busy sanding down the staircase and re-varnishing it, as well as offering to serve as Owners' sex toy. Then on Sunday i am, at Her request, taking Owner to a thermal spa in London. It will be an opportunity for Her to ease Her shoulder and an opportunity for me to splash around in my bikini.

Oh, and some good news. The replacement cage for the beehive chastity device, the original split, was delivered so i have been back caged inside that all week. Hopefully it will turn out that the first was simply defective and this new cage will not suffer the same fate. Fingers crossed as Owner and i both love it.

Lastly, Owner has been researching some new items that She would like. One is a new strap-on harness and the other a large, realistic cock dildo (complete with foreskin) to both fuck me with and for me to practice fellating. i am very excited! Owner has asked that i buy them for Her birthday, which is on the 1st April.

That's about it from me for now.

A Quiet Week

It has been a relatively quiet week in Owners' house. i have been getting on with my chores and tasks and have spent the week mostly indoors. The exception was a brief foray out to the shop and to get a coffee for Owner and, on Wednesday, to accompany Owner to and from the local train station carrying Her bag for Her as She had an out of town work meeting to attend.

Spending the week working from home did give me an opportunity to wear my new little skirt which has fast become a firm favourite of mine. It barely covers my knickers and shows off my stocking tops and butt cheeks. It's the perfect length for a wanton little slut like me to wiggle about in. On a number of occasions Owner sidled up behind me and groped my buttocks whilst i was wearing it. This had the immediate affect of causing me to spread my legs apart for Her. 

Some strangers also got to see me wearing my little skirt during the week. Twice our front doorbell rang and i answered it wearing my bra, blouse, new skirt, suspenders and stockings and on another occasion i was wearing the same combination when i took the rubbish outside.

My new skirt is the perfect length for a slut like me, it only just covers my bottom

However, it has not just been a case of me spending the week wandering about in short skirts! 

On Monday, after work, i spent 30 minutes stood naked, save for the stockings i was wearing, hands on my head in front of our lounge window with a pair of Owners' used panties on my head and with my nipples clamped. The panties were positioned with the gusset under my nose, so i inhaled Owners' wonderful aroma, and the clover clamps were the vicious ones with serrated metal teeth that really bite into my teets. 

Outside dusk was falling, the window blinds were open and the lounge light was on so the silhouette of me stood naked, hands on head etc was probably quite visible from the street outside through the net curtains. i felt quite exposed as the minutes ticked by until Owners alarm indicated half an hour had passed and i was able to return to my duties.

Friday saw a double bill. First, i was instructed to attach the piss funnel gag to my mouth and sit in the shower cubicle whereupon Owner relieved Herself into the funnel, quickly filling my gagged mouth with Her warm, fresh, wonderful piss. It was not easy to swallow and gulp down the amber nectar as fast as it was being squirted into the gag and before long my chin, neck and chest became soaked with urine as it spilt from my mouth and the gag. In the end, however, i was able to gulp it all down, tipping my head backwards to knock the last mouthful back down my throat.

human toilet

Having soaked me and quenched my thirst Owner then electrocuted me. She first secured me to the bed, to ensure that my arms and legs did not thrash about, then electrocuted my clit, my nipples, my pussy and my swollen labia using a combination of the electro clit torture device, the tazapper and the electric clamps.

The collection of electric shock devices Owner used

Arms and legs (out of shot) secured

Owner really enjoys electrocuting me. These regular Friday electrocution nights have fast become a favourite of Hers in lieu of Her being able to cane, beat, paddle, whip or flog me because of the issues She continues to have with Her frozen shoulder. It is really causing Her a lot of discomfort and sleepless nights. Hopefully it will soon start to unlock as it is horrible seeing Her suffer and there being little i can do to help beyond provide Her with regular shoulder massages. i know She also wants to be able to electrocute and beat me again as soon as She is able to. It will be wonderful when She is able to once again release some of the stress and tension from Her week by tenderising my buttocks and the backs of my thighs, as well as electro-shocking me. This also helps me to increase my tolerance for pain and discomfort, something that is important to Her and which She expects of me. 

Anyway, back to yesterday evening. When Owner was done electrocuting me i was untied and then left to get on with preparing dinner. After this was served i cleared, washed and put away the dishes then set about my usual Friday evening chore of cleaning the kitchen and sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor. i then returned to Owner, gave Her a head scratch before being invited to join Her on the sofa to watch TV together. It rounded off a quiet but wonderful week.

Control

Control is such a simple little word but it is one that runs through the heart of every Female-Led or Femdom relationship, namely the ceding of control by the submissive to the dominant female. That has definitely been the case for Owner and i as the relationship we enjoy has strengthened and deepened. The greater the level of control She exercises the deeper in love with Her i fall and the more i long to submit to Her further.

The story of how Owners control over me has evolved and how my submission to Her has correspondingly deepened is a long one. The journey of our relationship has, at times, been a winding one. There were times when things would go backwards, especially early on or we would be side-swiped events in life that were outside of our control. But our objective always remained the same, Owners control of me and my submission to Her.

At its most basic Owner loves having a wife (me) who does what She is told and who strives to make Her life as comfortable and pleasurable as possible. To that end She has invested time and effort training, disciplining and teaching me to become the wife She wants and which She also deserves. One who gladly and willingly submits to Her.

Today, Owner has control of pretty much all aspects of my life outside of work. That did not happen overnight. It was not a case of Her suddenly waking up one morning, announcing She has full control and hey presto. No, it was a gradual, incremental process that allowed time for each of us to adjust to the new power dynamic between us. Only when a shift in control over one aspect of my life had become normalised did She tighten Her control further. Of late, however, that process has accelerated and i could not be happier.

Before going on to explain how it is important to emphasise here that what we are talking about is the consensual submitting to Her control by me.  In no sense was this forced upon me. Rather, it was something i actively sought and welcomed. The more controlling of me Owner has become the deeper my love and devotion to Her has grown. i love submitting to Her. Being told what to do and controlled by Owner makes me happier than i could ever have imagined possible

Over the years Owner has come to control me not simply sexually (which was the first thing She took control of) but She also also what i wear, whether or not i can go out, what i eat when we are out, what i do with my time, what She expects of me to name but a few. One of the biggest 'moments' in my journey of submitting completely to Her was when i relinquished control of my salary. This was actually done at my own request, it just felt right and proper that i ask Owner if She would do me the honour of permitting have my wages paid into a joint account controlled by Her rather than into my own current account. In return i was given a monthly allowance by Owner of £100 a month, a sum that has remained unchanged for many, many years.

At the time it felt like the biggest shift in our power dynamics. Having my own money to spend as i wish is something that had been part of my life since my teens. Surrendering that, to no longer have financial control and instead receive a monthly allowance, felt and was a big step at the time. It was something i wanted and dreamt about, becoming dependent upon Owner, but initially i found it difficult to actually request. However, in the end i asked Her if She would do me the honour of taking take my financial independence away. Owner agreed and i am so pleased She did. At the time, and we are talking many years ago now, it was an important demonstration of my desire and willingness to submit more deeply to Her. It marked a significant moment in the evolution of our relationship.

It also demonstrates another thing. Owner taking more control over me has, on occasion, been at my own request, a response to my own desire to want to submit more fully to Her. That was the case with my salary. i was a more than willing accomplice, it was me who asked Her if She would do me the honour of taking control of it from me. Owner has ever since exercised Her control of my finances diligently. i love this, love that i no longer have financial autonomy. 

In the past few years Owner has also assumed control of another fundamental aspect of my life outside of work, namely my freedom of movement. As Her submissive wife Owner rightly regards my place as being at home, where She can keep an eye on me or expect to find me. Accordingly, that is where She expects me to be unless i have been invited to accompany Her somewhere. Nowadays, other than on the occasions when i need to leave the house for work, the only time i leave the flat without Her as my escort is when i need to run an errand for Owner or have been given an outdoor challenge to complete by Her. The exception to this is if i have obtained Her permission to go and visit one of my parents. The idea that i might suddenly just decide to go out for a walk on my own, or join colleagues for a drink after work, has become unimaginable. i don't and i wouldn't. My place is at home.

i love living like this, being constrained in were i can go. i am also a very willing participant. It is not as if She locks me in. At any moment i could walk outside. In that respect the door to the cage is always very much open. However, i choose to remain inside. My place is in Owners' home. However, She also regularly take me out, we both love each others company and enjoy doing things together. Owner also enjoys socialising without me with Her friends. On such occasions you will find me at home, contentedly doing the housework until summoned to go and collect Her from the station and walk Her home. Some people may find this strange, others will not. Owner is my life and i am very happy being Her stay at home wife. 

Owner is Her own woman, free to meet and see whoever She wishes, go wherever She wishes, do whatever She wants. i am not. i would not want things any other way. In recent years Owner has taken to going away for a few days with Her best friend. An opportunity for them to let their hair down, re-connect and have a good time. i am really, truly happy to see Her doing this. Owner knows She is free to do whatever She chooses, knowing that Her loyal and obedient wife will always be waiting for Her when She returns home.

Excitingly, to me at least, at the end of last month Owner introduced a new element of control over me. Fed up with me interrupting Her with my trivia and inanities whilst She was busy or reading Owner stipulated that i must now seek Her permission before engaging Her in conversation. To this end i now always wear a lanyard around my neck which i must raise to indicate whenever i wish to say something to Her. i must then wait until She indicates whether or not i am permitted to speak. It is a new form of control that She has introduced and which She now enjoys over me.

This restriction on my freedom of speech has fast become 'normal' to me. The 'permission to speak' lanyard is now the first think i put on when i get out of bed and the last item i take off before going to bed. When i do leave the flat i hang it next to the entrance so that i might put it back on the instant i return. In just a matter of weeks wearing and using it has become second nature to me. i would not wish to go back to how we were, i much prefer my newly muted state.

Which brings me onto the most recent example of Owners' increasing control over me. It happened over the weekend of our wedding anniversary and i hope it marks a new chapter, both in Owners' control over me but in my own willingness to accept and submit to Her authority. It relates to my job. 

My work is quite high profile (in my field) and is attracting growing international interest. Last year i was invited to lecture in Italy and present at a conference in the USA. i was flattered and accepted both invitations without, in truth, really consulting Owner. Although She was pleased for me Owner was upset that i was leaving Her, especially for the USA trip. She made it clear She was not happy that i was going. However, my ego took over and i went anyway. i regret having done so. Doing so upset Owner and also set me back in my own journey of submission to Her.

At my worse i sometimes allow my work to take over my life when what i really want is for my life to be centred around my service to Owner. Serving and submitting to Her is the aspect of my life that makes me happiest and of which i am most proud. i love Her and although i am lucky in that i find my work interesting, i am not in love with it, whereas i am with Her. 

Fast forward to Friday last week. i received a work invitation to attend a workshop in Beijing in China that is taking place this Spring. i have never been to China and was flattered and a little excited. However, i also recognised i would first need to ask Owner. i therefore left it with my manager that i would have to first discuss the invitation with my wife before i responded.

Owners' response was clear and immediate. She did not want me to go.  Before the weekend was out i had emailed the organisers to decline the invitation, letting my manager know as well that i would not be going. Far from feeling disappointed what i actually felt was giddy, giddy with excitement. i realised that in accepting without question Owners decision i had further and willingly submitted and surrendered to Her and Her control. It felt like a really significant moment. The further extension of Her control, and my submission to Her authority, this time in relation to my job. i ended the weekend almost elated at what had happened. i had been offered an opportunity that appeared exciting but which would have taken me away from the person i want to be with above all others. She in turn had been unequivocal in Her view that She did not wish for me to go and, rather than seek to argue, persuade or ignore Her opinion i had accepted it without question. More than that, i had gladly accepted. i was grateful to Her for exerting Her authority over me and proud of the manner in which i readily acquiesced. She exerted control and i submitted. Doing so made me feel really very happy.

There are, i imagine, some readers who may find the above to be strange, perhaps even troubling? If you do, then you really do not fully understand me. i want to be controlled by Owner, the more She does so the more i crave it. My place is at Her side and in Her home. My ambition is to one day be accepted by Her as Her maid servant, perhaps even Her slave. She wants me to be with Her, serving Her, not the other side of the world. That is my place. She does, and always should, come first. 

My work, although rewarding, is as nothing compared to the rewards i receive every day that i have the privilege of serving and submitting to Her. It is right and proper that i stay at home. i hope my staying shows further growth, progress and development on my part in my quest to truly submit unconditionally to Owner. She is the centre of my world.

7th Wedding Anniversary

Today marks Owner and my seventh wedding anniversary. We have been together much longer than that, this year is the 20th anniversary of when we first met and got together, but seven years ago today saw us stood underneath the iconic 'Welcome to Las Vegas' sign exchanging vows. You can read all about that day here.

Becoming Owners' lawfully wedded wife remains the best decision in life that i ever made. Having Her as my life partner and Owner, until death do us part (or She tires of me) is such a wonderful honour and privilege. We plan to renew our vows on the occasion of our 10th wedding anniversary. This year we marked it with the simple exchange of cards and gifts, Owner bought be a beautiful heart-shaped framed map of Las Vegas, i bought Her a necklace and a Lelo vibrator (Her pleasure is my pleasure). We went out and celebrated the occasion a day early.

Firstly by going to the Linder exhibition at the Hayward Gallery, which was brilliant, ollowed by a walk along the Thames to London Bridge and then onto Tower Hill and beyond for a bit of an impromptu pub crawl. We visited a couple of different establishments before alighting on one that we liked. An amazing old-fashioned pub called the 'Princess of Prussia' where we stayed for a drink, or...ahem...well more than a two, let's leave it at that. This was us fooling about in the pub:

Today, being the 16th of the month also meant that, after serving breakfast and exchanging our presents, it was time for two sets of dice to be rolled. The first was the chastity dice. Last time the dice decided that i must spend a month continuously caged. What would be in store this time? Unbeknownst to me Owner had added a new, much longer lock-up period to the options on the dice. That is what i rolled. i will be spending the next six months caged 24/7. Her chastity dice will not be rolled again until mid-August and my clit will remain locked away until then, released only for supervised cleaning.

The second dice to be rolled were the outdoor challenge dice. Once again it decided that mid-winter is the ideal time to be seen in a pink bikini outdoors, specifically out in the street next to ours. This is how i got on with completing that particular challenge.

It was only about 3 degrees celsius outside so i didn't linger for long in my bikini! This street i was instructed to pose in is also only about 200 metres from where we live, so there was plenty of chance of being seen by a neighbour. It is also over-looked from three directions and the challenge was done at about 11am, so there were people out and about who saw me. i wonder what they made of me?

The weekend has also seen me getting on with my tasks and chores, studying Spanish and completing my exercises. Owner actually presented me with a delicious and refreshing glass of Her piss to consume after i completed my exercises yesterday. It was just the reviving tonic that i needed as i was hot, tired and sweaty from my workout;

Last night Owner also treated me by instructing me to purchase tickets for us both to go and see the band Babymetal in concert in May. i have always wanted to go and see them as i love their music and their outfits but the performances also look amazing. See for example this epic performance of their song 'Headbanger':

Back to today. For our anniversary lunch i made Owner roast chicken with vegetables, one of Her favourite dishes.

Owners' meals served on a plate

mine in my pink dog bowl - which all my meals are eaten from

Before dinner i was instructed by Owner to fuck myself with Her brown dildo for Her entertainment. i did so on all fours on the floor in front of where Owner was sat on the sofa. Whilst i fucked my hungry pussy She tested out Her new Lilo vibrator. i was careful not to get myself too excited and have an accidental leak, which Owner would have regarded, quite rightly, as unforgiveable. To lessen the chance of that happening i occasionally fellated the dildo, sucking it clean, before re-inserting it and continuing to fuck myself. Owner had set Her timer for ten minutes and occasional announced how many minutes i had left to keep fucking my pussy. i was oddly relieved when finally the ten minutes were declared to be up and i was able to show Owner my clean caged clit, not a sign of leakage to be seen. It has now been over eight and a half months, 260 days to be precise, since i last experienced an orgasm of any kind. i am truly grateful and thankful that She has kept me in a state of long-term orgasm denial.

fucking my pussy in front of Owner

All in all has been an eventful and memorable anniversary and i can't wait to spend the next year of wedded and submissive bliss with Owner. She is the best Owner and life partner i could ever have hoped for, i am truly grateful to be able to live my life with Her and be kept under Her control.

Talking of control. Owner has not had cause to be upset or disappointed with me during this, the second week of the trial. i have, therefore, not needed to add any new entries into my punishment book. Fingers crossed my performance will continue to be regarded as satisfactory by Her such that, when the trial period concludes in March, i might be considered worthy of having my life and actions more tightly and rigidly controlled by Her. i love my life as Owners' submissive wife.

The Trial - A Progress Update

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Tripple Treats

Owner really treated me yesterday afternoon. After i made lunch, washed the dishes and finished cleaning out the fridge She gave me permission to order two new cleaning smocks to wear. My current ones are a little faded and no longer look smart. Owner also let me order a new mini-skirt, to replace the one i usually wear when working from home, as it too has gone to the great recycling scheme in the sky on account of it looking somewhat past its prime. i can't wait for my new smocks and skirt to arrive.

Owner also presented me with a lovely full, fresh glass of Her freshly decanted piss early yesterday afternoon which She handed to me to drink. On account of it having been poured slightly later in the day Her amber nectar was light and fresh, the colour of white wine but with a better taste, a real palate cleanser.

It was consumed with relish. i truly love drinking Owners urine, whether it be Her rich and full-bodied dark amber early morning servings or the lighter, crisper white wine coloured urine She dispenses later in the day. All are delicious. It is a drink i have come to crave.

She was not, however, done. More bodily treats were in store for me. With Her fresh piss drunk by Her eager slut Owner then instructed me to strip off and wait for Her naked in Her bed. After a few minutes She joined me under the sheets, the difference being She was fully clothed whilst i was naked.

Owner instructed me to lie on my side so that She could fondle me properly then went to work, groping, molesting and caressing me. She fondled, stroked, squeezed and mauled my breasts, my caged clit, my pussy whilst i groped me Owner also took the opportunity to rub Her crotch against my buttocks and my legs, using my body as a tool for Her pleasure. But it was not just Owner who was getting aroused, i was too. Especially when She then cupped my caged clit in Her hand, exposing the vulnerable twin lobes of my swollen labia which She then began to spank with Her free hand. 

She struck each softly at first before striking them harder and harder, causing me pain which swiftly morphed into excited arousal. Would Owner continue hitting me down there until She forced me beg to be allowed to orgasm? On the very rare occasions that She does make me cum, this is typically how Owner does it, by beating my exposed bits so hard that i quite literally howl in anguished pleasure as i beg to be allowed to orgasm. Thankfully, however, Owner also knows that orgasms are not good for me and so was careful not to hit me so much as to make me cum, just enough to ensure that i became highly aroused and animalistic. She also rightly expects the focus of such sexual encounters to be on Her, Her orgasm, Her pleasure and needs. 

Accordingly, stopped beating my swollen bits, removed her trousers and knickers, took Her vibrator from Her bedside cabinet and began to pleasure Herself with Her mechanical toy. As She did She rolled onto Her side, lifted Her knees to Her chest and instructed me to lick out Her arsehole.

My response was eager and immediate. i positioned myself behind Her in a reverse spoon position, She lifted Her leg so that my tongue had full access to Her anus, then gripped my head between Her thighs, locking me in place. Feeling horny as hell i spread Her cheeks apart with my hands then began to feverishly lick and lap Her backside, revelling in the scent and the taste of Her bottom as my tongue pushed deep inside into Her delicious butthole. 

As Her submissive slut wife and human sex toy Owner has long since denied me access to the holy shrine of Her pussy, and quite rightly so, She has no need of me there. That is a private shrine reserved for Her vibrators or anyone She might ever choose to invite, not me. My place, my task in helping Her climax, is worshiping and pleasuring Her butt with my tongue. It has become what She expects of me and i, in turn, have become obsessed by it. i love and adore it, crave the opportunity to smell and taste Her divine anus, lubricate it with my tongue, probe and devour it. i love feeling Her sphincter muscles quiver and contract as Her vibrator brings Her off in a manner that i cannot. 

In no time at all Owners hips began to rythmically rock back and forth, Her bottom bouncing against my straining tongue as it probed deeper inside Her whilst She clamped Her vibrator hard against Her clit. My own arousal increased, my clit throbbing in its cage as Owners backside grew wet with my saliva, smearing and smudging my makeup. She climaxed with my tongue deep inside Her arsehole as Her vibrator buzzed and pulsed millimeters from my nose, held fast against Her long forbidden (to me) sex.

Afterwards, as we lay in each others arms, i thanked Owner for allowing me the privilege and the treat of licking and tasting Her anus. i also thanked Her for having spanked my labia hard to ensure that i was left highly aroused but denied and frustrated whilst was sexually satisfied. It is how i love to be and feels right and appropriate for us both. She can take and receive pleasure whenever and however She chooses. My own goal, sole purpose and main pleasure in life is in ensuring Owner receives the pleasure She expects and deserves.

i am a very happy and contented, even though sexually frustrated, horny but denied, arse licker. i adore the smell and the taste of Owners anus and cannot think of a place i would rather be or a thing i would rather be doing in life than tonguing Her divine backside. It was a wonderful afternoon. A day of treats and delight. Just as i love drinking Owners piss i hope one day to also get to become Her full toilet slave, my tongue and mouth entrusted with ensuring Her backside is always spotlessly clean.

Owner has also changed what She expects from me during the current trial period She has placed me into. Rather than have me request each Saturday that She sit on my face She now wants me to ask Her how i might please Her as Her sextoy every Saturday? We both agree that this feels more appropriate and a truer recognition of my purpose to Her

The Trial Week 1 + A Broken Beehive and a Thank You

Well the first week of my month month long trial was successfully navigated without any slip-ups or failings (that i know of) on my part. i have ensured everything is spotlessly clean, have always used my lanyard to request permission first before talking to Owner, have greeted Her naked whilst prostrating myself and kissing Her feet when She has returned from Her early morning walks. i have also been organising some repairs to be done in the flat. [EDIT - Owner has just highlighted that there is limescale on the bathroom tap that has not been removed, i have entered into my punishment log]

Last night, at the end of the first full week of the trial, i did as i am now instructed to do every Friday during this period and asked Owner if She would electrocute me. She gladly obliged, but warned me that She was in a bad mood. Owner secured me to the bed before electrocuting my nipples, my clit, my butt cheeks and my 'pussy' as i flinched, bucked, twisted and squirmed. Owner's mood seemed to improve as a result of Her torturing me.

tied-up with a variety of electro-torture devices to hand

Meanwhile, i have stuck with my regular daily chores, prepared a variety of different meals during the week, kept up with my Spanish studies and provided Owner with daily head scratches and back massages on Her request. In short, i have been kept contentedly busy. Owner even gave me some tasks to complete during the day whilst i was working from home. The first of these tasks was requested on Monday when She pissed into a transparent water bottle and told me to take it to the park and then drink Her piss. This i did whilst sat in front of the park cafe - which seemed an appropriate location.

drinking Owners' piss in the park

It was delicious.

The next challenge came yesterday (Friday) when i was told to remain gagged between work meetings. It being a Friday i did not have that many calls so i wore the gag for extended periods. It was quite a challenge to avoid drooling spectacularly down my blouse whenever the gag was removed to join a Teams call with colleagues or clients.

gagged - also wearing my 'permission to speak' lanyard

working away

So, so far, so good. This weekend i need to get on with de-cluttering etc but hopefully i will continue to maintain my current, improved, performance for the duration of this trial period and Owner will deem me worthy of being yet more strictly controlled by Her.

Talking of strictly controlled. There is a blog i follow written by the wonderful sklave in stahl documenting his life as the 24/7 slave of his wife and mistress in their beautiful country home in Ireland (they are a German couple and the blog is written in German so, if like me you speak no German, you will need to translate each entry). Anyway, i find their lifestyle, although different in many respects to Owners and mine, to be inspiring. i have also struck up an occasional email exchange with him. Anyway, i have recently spoken of the current issues Owner has with Her frozen shoulder which is causing Her a lot of discomfort at times and restricting what She can do. Well the kind mistress of sklave in stahl generously permitted him to be briefly released from the metal chains he spends much of his time secured with in order for him to record two little instructional videos with some shoulder exercise suggestions for Owner. It was such a lovely gesture and Owner was very touched when She watched the videos that someone should go to such trouble and be so helpful. We were truly grateful.

There are a number of followers of this blog that i am in correspondence with and one thing always strikes me. All of them, without fail, are such wonderful, lovely people. Quite the antidote to some of the shit going on in the world right now. i feel blessed and lucky to have got to know them through this blog.

Anyway, back to the week that was. In less good news my new beehive chastity device broke quite dramatically at the start of the week - the cage split in three different places. Owner and i cannot think of anything we did that might have caused it to break and i can't believe my little clit is that powerful when excited to be able to break it when trying to get aroused. Unless, that is there was a flaw in the cage. Anyway, i am back in my old pink plastic nub device whilst we see if we can get the beehive replaced. 

That's about it for now. i will see later on if Owner might treat me again by sitting on my face and letting me worship Her divine backside. 

The Trial Begins + A Pyjama Party

Yesterday (1st February) marked day one of the trial period that Owner has set me. i must demonstrate to Her during this month long period that i am worthy of being more tightly controlled and dominated by Her by improving my performance and submission to Her.

As mentioned in previous posts, although the trial actually started yesterday, i have been implementing some of the changed behaviours Owner expects of me since earlier in the week to give me the best chance of 'normalising' them so that i do them as a matter of routine. Well, twenty-four hours in and so far, so good. 

i did my usual chores, but also remembered to not speak to Owner when She was listening to Her audio books without first seeking Her permission to do so. i also made sure that the shower tray and kitchen sink were both kept spotlessly clean. i also set about doing one of the tasks Owner set me for the month, and the one i find most difficult. Namely, clearing out some of the clothes that i don't really wear, or which are a little tired etc. i am a horder, especially when it comes to clothing, and don't like throwing items away. However, i filled a large refuse bag with clothing ranging from blouses and jackets to skirts and panties, all to be recycled. It was hard to do, but i did it.

The first day of the trial fell on a saturday which meant that, as per Her new rules, i could also ask Owner if She might grant me the wonderful pleasure of sitting on my face. She did much more than just that. Owner took me to bed and slowly stripped me until just my bra remained. This She also then removed but tied it around my head so that each of the cups covered my eyes, serving to blindfold me. It was most effective. Owner then donned Her strapon, pulled me off the bed and onto my knees before Her and had me fellate Her 'cock' whilst She brought Herself off with Her vibrator. It was a wonderful treat to be able to suck on Her cock as She pleasured Herself, thrusting Her phallus in and out of my throat leaving Her cock slick and wet with my saliva.

Satiated Owner then had me get up and lie on the bed, still blindfolded by my bra. She then positioned Herself astride my head, lowered Her hips down until Her backside was positioned just above my mouth and instructed me to worship Her delicious anus with my tongue as She once again positioned Her vibrator against Her pussy and began to pleasure Herself once more. i love and adore licking out Owners anus and was soon in seventh heaven with my little clit straining futilely in its cage as my tongue roamed, licked and explored, revelling in Her scent and taste. It was not long before the combination of my tongue and Her faithful favourite vibrator induced another orgasm for Owner, Her thighs clamping hard around my head as She climaxed. My tongue continued to gently lap Her sphincter until She had recovered enough to start to pleasure Herself with Her toy once again. Soon She was riding my tongue hard as it pleasured Her backside as Her toy brought Her to Her third climax.

Owner collapsed, seemingly spent and rolled panting to Her side. i was hot with frustrated desire and passion. My mouth and nose filled with the exquisite taste and scent of Her derriere, my face smeared with the forbidden juice of Her sex. i rolled sideways but rather than just lay panting in each others arms my tongue was directed to Her backside one last time. With my head between Her legs, as She lay on Her side on the bed, my hands spread Her butt cheeks apart and my fevered tongue went back to work as She worked Her vibrator across Her clit one last time. My tongue lapped, circled, swirled and probed Her backside as Her pleasure grew until the muscles of Her thighs quivered and gripped my head like a vice as Her final orgasm ripped through Her.

Later, as we lay flushed side by side Owner teased me about how difficult it must be to have my little clit so aroused but denied in its cage. It is frustrating but the opportunity to taste and pleasure Her anus is so wonderful i would happily remain denied for eternity just for the opportunity to worship Her divine backside. 

The above all happened a little after lunch. When we had recovered Owner and i went for a walk to the shops in order that i might get the last of the items i needed for the pyjama party that i hosted for Owner later in the day.

Owner regularly likes to have me entertain or organise things for Her and last week She advised me that She wished for me to arrange a pyjama party for Her. With Her permission matching outfits were ordered, party games were selected and an invitation was designed and sent to Her for a party starting at 5.30pm. In town i bought a selection of magazines for us to read and some matching friendship bracelets. When we returned i prepared the food and laid out pillows and put on some party music. Owner advised that i was allowed alcoholic drinks and so She prepared rum and coke for her and limoncello and lemonade drinks for me.

The party was a great success, Owner loved it and has said that She wants to have pyjama parties more often. Here are some pictures:

in our matching PJs

table set with food, games, drinks and magazines

Eagle-eyed viewers will note that i bought three different types of magazines for the party, gossip, fashion and one with images of male hunks. We enjoyed them all!