On My Knees

It feels as though i have spent quite a bit of my time this week on my knees for Owner, which i guess is how things should be. In no particular order i have spent time:

• Kneeling blindfolded to eat my dinner from my dog bowl on the floor at Owner's feet - chasing food around the bowl with my tongue and trying not to get my face covered in the process
• Kneeling on my hands and knees, legs spread apart, in my cage with chains attached to my ankles; my caged clit; the leather collar around my neck; and my pierced nipples - with a gag in my mouth to keep me quiet and a mini-cow bell around my neck to train me to stay still. Kneeling in this position with my thighs spread apart, pivoting forward at the waist with my hands on the floor in front of me causes my 'pussy' to wink open, making me feel quite exposed. It's a difficult position to maintain but with practice i am slowly getting better. So far the longest i have stayed like this is about an hour. Sometimes Owner will come over and touch or caress me but for the most part She ignores me until She summons me to join Her at Her side.
• Kneeling in front of Owner whilst i bathe Her feet and give Her a mini-pedicure and a foot massage
• Kneeling on the sofa, counting off the strokes as Owner canes me. She now strikes me a lot harder than She did when She first started to administer weekly disciplinary sessions. She takes turns delivering a set number of strokes, standing first on one side of me then switching positions and striking me from the other. i am required to count each stroke out loud. As She gets into the swing of things the strokes land harder, moving from my bottom to the back of my thighs as i wince with the impact. i am very grateful to Her caning or spanking, whipping or flogging me as She does.
   
  

So yes, it feels as though i have been kneeling quite a bit this week. Of course i have also been doing other things, like studying Spanish daily, working, cleaning, cooking and practising deep-throating my training dildo but i am grateful for the time i have spent on my knees for Owner even if i do, on occasion, struggle a little to get back up! The joys of a slightly aged body.

Here are some of the times i have been on my knees this week

near naked, chained and gagged in my 'cage'

on my knees in my heels on eating dinner

chasing food around my bowl whilst blindfolded

strike me Owner one more time

red cheeks and thghs

Anniversary and Outdoor Challenge

Today Owner and i celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary. Yes, this day four years ago Owner and i were standing under the iconic 'Welcome to Las Vegas' sign in Nevada, me in a pink dress and heels, Owner in a trouser suit and bow tie, getting hitched in front of a throng of tourists. It was a wonderful day and we both hope to return sometime to renew our vows.

To mark our wedding anniversary we each got each other a card and gifts which we opened at breakfast. Owner bought me a beautiful silver bracelet - i am a sucker for bracelets - engraved 'Owner 💛 pet'. It is super pretty and nice and chunky and i love it. In return i bought Owner a red leather, braided whip and a very cute clitoral stimulator - which i hope will bring Her many hours of pleasure.

Our anniversary cards to each other - guess who gave which to who:)

Owners' new clitoral stimulator - super cute or what?

Owners' new leather whip

My super lovely new bracelet (the top one)

It being the 16th of the month also meant that today was the day of my monthly outdoor challenge. i duly rolled Owners' dice that decide what challenge i need to complete and where i need to complete it, and the result was that i was to wear high heels and trousers at our local railway station. 

Owners' challenge dice decided

This combination has come up before and is a challenge that is less nerve wracking to complete than some of the other potential combinations. Today, however, was a busy day at work and so it was not until late afternoon that i was able to escape from work to complete my task. By that point the station was starting to get busy with commuters. It was also swarming with police for some reason - maybe they'd had a tip off :).

Anyway, i found my spot on the platform completed the challenge i had been set. Owner was satisfied with how i got on, you can see the results below

down at the station in my heels

in my raincoat and heels

and my funky headphones

It was a fun challenge to complete.

One final bit of news, i am now the proud owner of a new food bowl that Owner ordered for me. Regular readers may know that i am required to always eat from a dog bowl, and have had the same metal bowl for years. In fact, so accustomed am i to always eating from it that i have on occasions eaten from it when we have had family staying. i did wonder what they thought of the fact i was using a dog bowl to eat from, especially as we do not have a dog!

Anyway, my new bowl arrived today, and it even has the nickname Owner uses for me inscribed in pink on the side, aren't i lucky

That's it for now, until the next blog post.

Grab and Grope

Yesterday Owner woke me up by grabbing and caressing my butt. She ran Her fingers across the entrance of my pussy, stroking it whilst also squeezing and gently spanking my plump, swollen 'labia' at the base of my caged clit. She also pinched, rubbed and massaged my teats, causing them to quickly stiffen in response. 

It was a heavenly way to be woken up and i was soon spreading my legs, and presenting myself to Her like the wanton slut i am, moaning softly in response to Her touch. All the while my caged clit strained inside its tight little confine and my 'labia' grew swollen and engorged. i rolled partially onto my side presenting my swollen, exposed plums to be spanked. It was 5.45 am.

Owner continued to tease and caress me. She traced Her finger across the soft, smooth skin between the base of my clit and the entrance to my pussy. It is one of Her favourite parts of my body and a place Her fingers are regularly drawn to. She grabbed my breasts more firmly, squeezing them hard. As She mauled my titties i wished they were bigger. My fantasy is to have pert, fuller breasts with super elongated nipples that are easier for Owner to bite, stretch and chew but i know She likes them just as they are. 

As i lay there, moaning and fantasising Owner slapped and spanked my bits again, causing my clit to strain further inside the confines its tiny little cage. My labia bulged and i spread my thighs further apart, presenting my sex fully open for Her. Then the alarm went off. Owner stopped and i was despatched from the bedroom, aroused and frustrated to make breakfast.

A little over an hour later, my morning exercises completed, breakfast cleared away and having showered, flushed and cleaned my pussy found me dressed in my stockings, short skirt and blouse ready for work. i had wandered into the kitchen to make a coffee and was stood at the kitchen sink, staring out of the large window at the house opposite when Owner sidled up behind me. She placed Her hands under my skirt and deftly pulled down my panties.  i immediately bent forward and parted my legs as She pushed Her hand between my buttocks and rubbed my pussy, groped my arse and fondled my caged clit. Then She stopped and told me to carry on.

Why am i writing this? Because it illustrates one aspect of our relationship well. Namely, that my body is always available to Owner to tease and torment and caress as She likes, in public or in private. Only She is allowed to initiate any form of sexual activity between us. This was one of the first 'rules' She established all those years ago when we first started our journey into a Female-led relationship. It was made clear that my body existed solely for the purpose of Her pleasure and entertainment. i was to become Her sex toy and was to be available for Her amusement and pleasure at any time.

i love the constant little reminders Owner gives me that my body is Hers and that She can do as She pleases with it. She does, on a regular basis, grab and grope me, fondling and squeezing my chastised clit and massaging my 'labia', squeezing my butt and sliding Her hand down to caress the entrance of my pussy or groping my breasts through my top. She does this at home and, on occasion, in public. When She does this being the eager slut that i have become, i will spread my legs or generally try to make myself available and open to Her attention.

Such attention rarely leads to anything else, they are simply reminders that my body is Hers and She can touch, grab, grope and expose it whenever and wherever She likes. For my part, i melt a little inside each time She does this, my little caged clit throbs and my pussy tingles in pleasurable anticipation. 

i love to be treated by Owner as Her sexual play thing, to be grabbed by Her, especially in public. There was once a time when i would have been embarrassed, mortified even to be publicly groped. Now i crave it. i fantasise about being out in public somewhere really busy dressed in a pretty skirt and stockings and for Owner to lift my skirt up and pull my knickers down so that they fall to the ground around my ankles and then have me stand there, hordes of people passing by, with my legs spread apart and my knickers at my feet. In my daydreams the locations vary, Trafalgar Square, Waterloo Bridge at the bar of a busy pub but the fantasy is the same, stood for all to see with my panties around my ankles.

This week Owner also demonstrated Her control over me in a different way, by having me eat my dinner from my dog bowl whilst kneeling on the floor blindfolded with my hands secured behind my back. It is a messy way to eat, to empty the bowl requires that you pitch forward so that you are face down in the food. It was also quite thrilling too, to be at Owners' feet as She ate at the table whilst i was down on the floor, eating from my bowl. What is more, every time i bent forward my hungry pussy winked open so that all i could think about was of Owner being inside of me, fucking me, as i stuffed my face with food. It was a deliciously naughty thought.

face down in my food

blindfolded with my hands secured behind my back eating my dinner

By the time the bowl was empty my blindfold was covered in food as too was my face, it was wonderfully degrading and i loved every messy, humiliating minute of it.

Last night i was not feeling quite at my best. Perhaps just the result of quite a long and intense week of work. Owner very kindly cooked dinner but i still completed my evening chores (cleaning the kitchen and the aquarium) before presenting myself for my weekly disciplining. i think Owner held back a little with my caning on account of me feeling not quite my normal self, though i still received multiple strokes across my backside, the backs of my thighs and my breasts. The fact that She still disciplined was greatly welcomed and appreciated by me. Once upon a time She would not have done so if i was feeling under the weather. i am very happy that this was not the case last night and that She still carried out my weekly disciplining. Another indication, i think, of Her continuously evolving domination of me.

Caning aftermath last night

This morning i was again gifted a glass of Her delicious urine for breakfast. My wonderful weekly treat and a great way to start a day. 

Later this morning we are setting off on a day trip to meet up with my dad and his partner. We have booked a restaurant where Owner will, as is now always the case whenever we eat out, decide what i will eat and drink. Another aspect of our relationship that has now become second-nature to us, that Owner decides for me what i will have. As for myself, i will be sat there wearing my pretty knickers, padded bra, nice blouse and jeans, in chastity with my makeup on making small talk to my dad whilst secretly longing for my wonderful Owner to fondle and grope me and have me demonstrate what an eager, obedient and submissive slut i am.

Current mood = horny, frustrated and very happy [ comment from Owner - I thought you were always in this mood :)]

Quarantine Update

So Owner and i remain in quarantine following our return from Spain. Our first Covid test returned negative and we should get the results of our day 8 test soon. Meanwhile, we were contacted to say we had been in contact with someone who had tested positive (presumably on the flight) and should self-isolate. However, as we are doing that anyway there was no real need to change anything. All being well assuming our second result is also negative we can leave the flat on Tuesday.

In the meantime, the past week has been super busy and stressful with work with a lot of long hours. Owner and i also once again drew in the Euro football competition, with each of us choosing the same number of winning teams, albeit again some of them were different to each other. This meant that i again escaped an extra challenge/punishment, in the case of the last 16 this would have meant an extra caning had i lost. Still, i am to receive 250 strokes at some point today as part of the weekly discipline Owner now administers.

There were, however, two additional activities to report on from the week just gone. The first was that i was treated to a glass of Owners' urine for breakfast. i do love drinking Her piss and it is not often that i am given an opportunity to do so. It was a real treat. Here i am downing Her wine at 6am

With it being Her first pee of the day it was a lovely deep, rich and aromatic amber nectar!

Owner also had me eat dinner from the floor one evening with my hands tied behind my back. We discovered, however, that as i am not the most flexible of people i struggled to get my head fully down into the dog bowl with it on the floor. Owner propped it on top of an upturned container so that i could reach it. However, the slurping noises i then made as i siphoned up the food (scrambled egg) distracted Her from Her own meal. i suspect that if i am told to eat from the bowl like that again i may get banished to another room. Here i am attempting to get my head down into the bowl

hands secured trying to eat my dinner

how low can i go?

There is more football today (as there was last night). Maybe this time i will have to undertake a Euro football challenge/punishment? i guess i will find out soon enough.

Take care everyone.

Last Days of Advent

As Christmas approaches, and as the UK fast descends into....well farce, it is also nearly the end of Owner's advent calendar. i can't believe that there are just two fun-filled little envelopes left to open until Christmas Day itself. Owner has already declared Her calendar idea to have been such fun that She is going to recycle some of the tasks i have completed these past few weeks and have me do them again in the future. It's a wonderful thought and something to look forward to for 2021.

In the meantime, this is just a quick update on yesterday and today's advent asks of me. Yesterday was quite a simple task, i was to serve dinner to Owner whilst completely naked except for a pair of high heels. Simple enough, all i had to do was avoid spilling the food, a risk that i am pleased to report that i successfully avoided. So i present to you the naked, high heel wearing poppet.

can you guess which serving is mine?

Yes, there is a reason why i am carrying a plate and a dog bowl. The reason is that all of my meals are eaten from a dog bowl (breakfast, lunch, dinner). Owner has long-held the view that this is the most appropriate form of dish for me to eat from. i am lucky that at least She permits me to use cutlery, though on very rare occasions this has been denied to me - which makes for some messy mealtimes! In fact, so accustomed am i to eating from a dog bowl that on one occasion in the past when my Dad was staying over i wonder why he was staring at me eating at breakfast. It took a while for me to realise that yes, it probably does look odd to see your son eating cereals from a dog bowl, especially as we also don't have a dog!

Anyway, back to the advent calendar. Todays task, revealed when i opened the envelope this morning, was to perform a strip-tease for Owner. i did this after work and opted, for my musical accompaniment, to strip to the classic David Rose jazz style number The Stripper. It was great fun to do and i ended my performance sitting on Owner's lap. i also got an opportunity to wear my brand new fishnet stockings, which i think are divine (Owner agrees). Anyway, here is a picture and a short video clip of me in pursuit of Owner ready to snare Her with my feather boa

Flashing my fishnet stocking tops

i wonder what my final two advent tasks will bring?

Stay safe everyone.

On Punishments and Consequences

Owner has a number of principles that inform Her approach to Her domination and control over me. One of these is that Her time is important to Her and that She expects Her control over me to help free up time for Her to spend how She likes, not add additional demands on Her time. To that end She looks for ways to increase and maintain Her control over me which do not require significant additional effort on Her part. In many sub/Dom relationships the dominant partner can often spend a lot of time focused on the desires of their sub. This can be time the dominant enjoys spending and Owner enjoys times like this too. However, She also expects my serving Her should free up time for Herself and not create additional burdens for Her.

One way this manifests itself is in the use of the dice for deciding punishments or challenges etc that i need to undertake. Once Owner has come up with an initial set of ideas to load the dice with She can then relax and let chance decide what i will need to do rather than Her having to think of something all the time. Periodically, the dice are updated and loaded with new instructions of Her devising but they are essentially a sort of time and labour saving device that provide me with the discipline, consequences or challenges that i need and crave whilst ensuring Owner gets to spend as much time as She likes doing other things.

Another principle that informs Owner's approach is that a 24/7 Femdom life needs to be practical and fun.She is not a sadist nor i a masochist. She will inflict pain and discomfort but does not seek to 'break' me, though whether She perhaps should is another matter (i write rather nervously knowing that Owner will review this post before it is published). Owner also likes to keep things light-hearted and fun. We do not do 'sessions', we live and act as we do 24/7 and i don't think either of us could sustain for very long a very hardcore and intense Dom/sub relationship. Though i submit completely to Owner and She controls pretty much all aspects of my life outside of work i am not Her slave and neither has She ever asked me to become her slave. She teases me that i am fluffy and could not handle life as a real slave but i equally think it is not what She would ever want Herself either. She absolutely is in control but that control is not enforced with an iron rod.

So time-saving (for Owner) and fun are both important facets of our relationship and these tend to be reflected in the ways that Owner exercises Her control over me. If Owner is annoyed with an aspect of my behaviour She will make Her feelings quite clear verbally and admonish me, only rarely will She actually physically punish me. In the meantime, the dice are used to keep me on my toes, break down some of my remaining inhibitions, practice my skills, increase my pain tolerance and discourage me from working away from home as much as possible.

With that in mind, here are some examples of more recent dice-determined things i have had to do recently

eating my dinner whilst blindfolded - incidentally i eat all my meals from this dog bowl

washing-up naked except for a pair of hold-ups and my furry butt-plug

The video below shows me self-administering one of the more 'uncomfortable' dice punishments - beating my 'plums' with Owner's favourite leather paddle

Incidents and Updates

A couple of mildly interesting/amusing events occurred over the past week. The first was that during a work visit to the offices of another organisation i am working on a project with i was mistaken by their receptionist for a woman. This is about the first time this has ever happened as though i now always wear make-up and women's clothes at work (and have done for quite a while now) as well as outside work, my work clothes are not overly feminine, mostly blouses/tops and jeans. In fact, on this occasion as my day involved a formal work meeting i had actually slightly toned down my make-up a little. Thus, i was pleasantly surprised when, on walking into the reception area accompanied by a colleague of mine who is female the receptionists looked up and said ' Good morning ladies, how can I help you?' Made me smile anyway. [edit - Owner says the receptionist must have been blind]

The second, and altogether more amusing incident occurred this weekend. My Dad and his partner came to stay with Owner and i for a few days. As usual i made sure that i tidied away all of the objects and artefact's that would normally be found in full view in our flat but which you might not want your parents to see. Thus, the floggers, canes, crops, queening stool, clamps, heavy collars, 'slut daily chores' list etc were all tidied away out of sight. However, it is easy to forget how second nature some of my everyday activities have become and how i don't really even register anymore that, to another person, they may seem a little out of the ordinary. So it was that it didn't even occur to me that the sight of me standing up in the kitchen eating my breakfast out of a dog bowl might seem a little strange to my father! In short, i had become so used to the fact that i am expected to always eat out of a dog bowl that it didn't even register with me that doing so in front of my Dad might not be appropriate. Oh well, it goes down as another amusing incident in which i have accidentally incorporated family members into Owner and my lifestyle - as when, many years ago, i accidentally emailed my parents and my sister the Xmas present list that was intended solely for Owner. Needless to say i never did get a butt plug that year from my mum!

This weekend also marked the passing of the deadline for my compliance with Owners training and development plan for me - Her 'plin, plan, plon' as She calls it. Readers will recall that over the past three months Owner has been assessing and monitoring my performance against the outcomes set out in the plan. If i am deemed to have passed the plan new training and development tasks be introduced and added to those already set out in the plan. Owner has stated that She needs time to review and consider my performance and compliance and that i can expect to receive notification from Her by the end of the week as to how satisfactory or otherwise my progress has been and what will happen next. i will keep you posted.