Update and Staying Put

Please accept my apologies for not having posted for a while. There have been a number of things going on recently (not all good) which have kept me away from the blog.

The first of these is that Owner has had a bit of a health scare and needs to have some minor surgery at the end of next week. Hopefully that will sort out the matter. However, it has caused us both some concern and She is understandably a bit stressed about the whole thing.

A more practical issue was that, along with half the known universe, i also got the email from blogger announcing that this was to be one of the blogs they were, in effect, wanting to close down as they were going to change their rules around adult content. As i am sure was also the case for many others this led to a small flurry of activity on my part as i started to create an alternative and more secure home for my blog. What spare time i had went into trying to learn a new programme and transfer across the content from this blog and build a new site on an unfamiliar platform.

i had just about got to a point where i thought it was all starting to look good, we liked the new layout etc that was to appear on the new site, when suddenly another email from blogger arrived to say they'd changed their minds. So, to cut a long story short this blog is remaining here where it is and i am going to archive the new site i created. It was, i guess, a learning experience if nothing else.

You will, however, be pleased to hear that Owner has suitably punished me for the infractions i detailed in the post before last, namely not thinking and ordering an alcoholic drink without Owners permission when we were in a bar in Dublin before i cancelled the order when i realised, and using ingredients that were past their use by date when cooking Owners dinner. For the first (drinking) misdemeanour Owner punished me with 100 over the knee bare-bottom spankings with one of Her hair brushes. For the second misdemeanour (the food) - adjudged by Her to be the more serious i have been banned from wearing any make-up or jewellery for the past two weeks. i really have felt quite naked without these and can't wait until next week when hopefully i will be permitted to wear them again. Below is a picture taken during my spanking

A Lovely Time

Yesterday evening Owner and i went to see a screening of The Duke of Burgundy a film about two lesbian lovers, butterflies and moths and the demands and trials of the central characters S&M relationship. It is beautifully shot and worth checking out. As it was a trip to the cinema it also meant that i would be wearing a skirt in public once again. It is funny, wearing the skirt is not what makes the experience feel a little humiliating to me (which is part of the point) but rather the fact that i arrive in jeans and then change into a skirt so that anyone in the foyer waiting to go in who is paying attention must think to themselves 'I am sure that person was wearing skinny jeans a minute ago!'

Anyway, it is a teensy bit of public humiliation fun that i greatly enjoy as you might be able to tell from this photo that Owner took.

i adore my new skirt

Talking of Owner She has really now got into Her stride when it comes to choosing and ordering my meals for me in restaurants. Me looking at the menu has really started to become a pointless exercise. Last night before the movie She we went to an Italian restaurant where She ordered me a risotto. When the waitress came to take the orders Owner even used the phrase 'and he will have...'. i could have melted. i was in public displays of ownership and control heaven! i love the fact that little by little Owner continues o extend Her complete control over me.

Earlier in the afternoon we had a bit of a wander around the areas near to St Paul's Cathedral and went up once again to the viewing area near the shopping arcade next to it which affords great views of the cathedral and that part of London. You can get a sense o how close you are to the Dome of the Cathedral from the following picture

St. Paul's Cathedral

 And a rare shot of Owner!

After visiting the viewing area we dived into a coffee shop for a couple of hot chocolates. It was quite a cold day and, as you can see from my expression, i think i was quite pleased that we were both back inside in the

warmth.

Gagging in the Rain and Other Escapades

The other day Owner and i both went to the park for me to complete another of my public dildo deep-throat challenges. So far i have completed these challenges in the heart of City of London, in Canary Wharf, in a pub toilet and so on. Now it was time to complete one in our local park. It was a rainy day, hence the umbrella, but Owner announced Herself pleased with the results. You can judge for yourself how i got on from the following two pictures:

poised and ready to swallow

enjoying a mouthful!

Recently Owner also permitted me to purchase a new pretty apron to wear at home when i am cooking and baking. The apron was ordered from The Sunday Girl Company who are a UK-based company specialising in adults and children's aprons, i think it looks super cute

Meanwhile, i am delighted to say that my new tattoo has fully healed and the scab has now completely done. We are both really thrilled with the final result and i can't wait for the warmer weather to arrive to be able to properly show off my princess crown in public. You can see what it looks like now it has healed here

Talking of pretty things, i now also have a wonderful new pair of nipple rings. They are small silver keys adorned with little pink stones. They are super cute. The only drawback to them is that both of the pair face the same way as the gems are both on the same side. Ideally you would have them so that each key could face the other. That said, i really love them. We don't have a good picture of me wearing them, however, the image below, taken from the Etsy retailer i they were purchased them from (Bohemian Body Jewellery), shows you how pretty they are

However, there have been a couple of failings lately on my part that i am embarrassed to report and for which Owner will be rightly punishing me. The other weekend we went to Dublin and had a great time. However, on the Sunday at lunch i totally forgot myself and ordered a pint of Guinness when we went to a pub for lunch without Owner having given me permission to drink alcohol. i realised i was wrong to do so and quickly cancelled the order and had a Coke instead. However, it was a serious failing on my part and i deserve to be punished for it.

The other two incidents happened in quick succession and both involved food. As you will know i do all the cooking at home (unless Owner chooses to). On Sunday i prepared meatballs but used mince meat that had been lurking at the bottom of the freezer since last July. Owner has a strict rule that any food that has been in the freezer for longer than three months must not be used and should be disposed of. Thus was clearly a major breach of that requirement. To compound matters the following day i then was going to make a sweet and sour chicken but the soy sauce had already been opened and i hadn't kept it in the fridge but rather had returned it to the cupboard. Again, this breached Owners food hygiene standards. Owner was rightly annoyed with me as these are standards She has repeatedly set and this is not the first time i have been in breach of them (my last such infraction was about 18 months ago). It was made worse by my breaking these rules twice in successive days and demonstrated a very lax attitude on my part.

Owner has yet to determine what punishment i will receive for these misdemeanours but i recognise they were unacceptable on my part and that i deserve to be punished for them.

Learning and Development - Some Small But Significant Steps

The past few weeks have seen a couple of small but significant steps in my own learning but also in the progression and further deepening of my submission to Owner and Her control over, and treatment of, me. i will talk about the latter in a bit, first though i have some news concerning my own learning.

Anyone who has been reading this blog for a while will know that my Owner, and love of my life, is Spanish. Regular readers will also know that i have been trying (pretty unsuccessfully) for years to learn to speak Spanish and it has become one of Owners long-term projects and expectations of me. Under normal circumstances this might not be a big deal but for me it is as i have been an utter failure with languages throughout my life. Although i managed to do fairly well academically in other spheres (i have a history doctorate) when it comes to languages i have failed at every turn. Over the years i have tried French, German and even Arabic once all with the same results...failure. Although the rest of my family are all linguistically gifted i am not.

However, last year Owner laid down the challenge and expectation that, as part of my continuing development and training to become Her ideal wife She expected me to prepare for and enter a formal Spanish language exam. Specifically, the official Diploma of Spanish as a Foreign Language (DELE). This would sit alongside the other skills and learning She expects me to acquire ranging from giving facials, reflexology, massage, manicures, to knitting, embroidery etc, etc. In short, skills that might be useful to Her for me to have. Me knowing Spanish would, of course, be very useful/essential if She ever decided She wanted us to move to Spain, as one day She might.

i confess that i initially didn't have any expectations of passing but then as the months of practice passed i began to entertain thoughts that maybe i might. We agreed i should enter the beginners exam and see how i got on. The exam was held over two days in November last year and at the end of it i was convinced i had, once again failed. Owner tried to be positive but i didn' think i had done that well and started to try and psychologically prepare myself for a re-sit sometime this year. Imagine my delight and surprise then when the results arrived just over a week ago. i passed!! i was thrilled and amazed...for the very first time in my life i had actually passed a language exam! Owner was really pleased as well, However, we have already agreed that i will not be allowed to stop there but must now prepare to enter myself for the next level Spanish exam this autumn. There are many things that our relationship has helped to teach me and i have acquired a number of new skills. However, never in my wildest dreams did i imagine it might also help me start to learn a new language. Just another example of the many advantages an FLR/Femdom relationship can bring!

This weekend i also had an opportunity to demonstrate one of the other skills that i have started to acquire courtesy of Owner, namely jewellery making. Owner had me attend an introductory jewellery making course last year and now Her expectation is that i will produce a minimum of three new items for Her a month. This weekend i made Her some ear-rings. 

Meanwhile, this weekend also witnessed another small tightening of Owners overt control over me and Her treatment of me as Her slut. There are already many practical ways in which Owner exercises complete control over aspects of my life, these include;

• For many years now all decisions about what clothes i am permitted to wear and purchase have been Owners. i can suggest things to Her but am not allowed to buy anything unless She approves
•  Most purchases by me need Owners prior approval and all expenditure by me needs to be documented on a daily basis and made available to Owner to check at any time (we use Trello to document this and all other aspects of my submission, development and training)
• Any facebook posts (and of course blog entries) by me need prior vetting and approval from Owner before uploading
• i am only permitted to drink alcohol if and when Owner says so and am not permitted to try to seek Her approval to have a drink (this initially took a while to adjust to, especially when staying with family)
• Owner decides to what, when and where we go out - i may make suggestions but the decision is Hers
• We have got rid of/recycled most of my possessions
• All meal preparation, cooking, cleaning and other housework is my responsibility. Owner may help if She chooses but the expectation is that it is my job to do.
• Owner expects me to present Her with daily options for what i might prepare for dinner for Her to decide from
• An expectation that, unless She specifically says otherwise, i should always be doing something constructive and useful in my free time
• having an orgasm only if and when Owner permits me to (i spend much of my time in chastity) and accepting that my body is Owners to use for Her sexual pleasure

All of the above have gradually developed as part of my submission to Owner over the years.

To this list has now been added a new element of control that Owner first implemented this weekend. Namely, that when we eat out (as we do relatively frequently) Owner will choose what i am to eat. Owner stipulated this as a new requirement with the launch of the latest phase of Her development and training programme for me in December last year. However, by Her own admission it is something that She had forgotten to start to implement, that is until this weekend. On Sunday, for the first time, Owner decided what it was i was going to eat when we ate out.

For me it was another happily submissive and emasculating experience.  It did feel a little strange/unusual to realise that there was little/no point in me looking at the menu as the choice would be Owners entirely. However, it also felt right and as it should be. Ironically, Owner actually chose something for me that i wouldn't normally have picked for myself as though i will eat anything i have become accustomed to choosing dishes that Owner might want to eat as well in case She doesn't like Her first choice - Owners culinary tastes aren't as catholic as mine. i do hope that Owner taking control of what i may or may not eat becomes as much the norm as other aspects of my life that She now controls.

Once we returned from a day of shopping yesterday (during which Owner bought me a new bra and permitted me to buy a new blouse) we returned home for a session of bondage and torture. Owner enjoys tying me up and abusing and tormenting me and, over the years, has lost a lot of the initial reluctance She once felt about inflicting pain on Her wife. Where previously my wincing or evident discomfort would have elicited concern lest She had hurt me now Owner instead rightly chastises such responses by me as evidence of how i have become 'too fluffy'. Yesterday She bound my wrists and ankles to a chair, blindfolded me then clamped my nipples hard. Next, in return for honouring me with the pleasure of sniffing the crutch of Her used knickers, She administered 30 strikes with Her cane to my chastised clitty - directing Her strikes hard to my exposed testicles. The pain and discomfort was intense but seemed to serve only to spur Her on more. i truly do cherish Owners growing willingness to and evident enjoyment of the infliction of pain on me. It was particularly gratifying and exciting to sit bound helpless to the chair, nipples and 'bits' ablaze and listen to the sound and feel of Owner masturbating Herself to an orgasm with Her vibrator as She rubbed Herself hard against my body whilst all along my clit remained firmly (and tightly) locked in its metal chastity cage.

However, Owner took Her abuse and use of me further. She used one of Her dildo's to forcibly fuck my throat, having me repeatedly deep-throat the large rubber cock, pushing it deep into my throat, pulling my head down onto it, making me gag again and again. In between, She sprayed a small bottle of Her golden wine that She had filled in the bathroom, into my mouth, all over my face. She sprayed Her fake cock with Her golden nectar and had me lick it off, She sprayed it over my chest, She sprayed my locked clit. In short, She soaked me with Her piss as She fucked my face. It was a wonderful and degrading way to treat Her slut and it was a joy to behold and to be treated in such a manner by Her. i loved being face-fucked until i choked and snorted, loved being covered in Her urine - made to stick out my tongue and open my mouth wide to drink it, made to suffer pain and denial. In short, it was wonderful to be degraded as treated as Owners slut and whore and to experience Her inflicting pain, discomfort and humiliation as She pleasured Herself.

Afterwards, Owner again said how much She too had enjoyed Herself. Such comments, and Her evident readiness to treat and degrade Her wife this way, make me extremely happy. The greater and more overt Owners control over me becomes, the more She uses and abuses me physically, the more She degrades and exhibits me and the dirtier She treats me then the happier still i become. i truly am very lucky indeed.

Outdoor Fellatio, Indoor Torture and Piss Drinking

This weekend is barely 3/4 of the way through and it is already turning into a little classic. Yesterday Owner and i were once again out and about in town on a mission to complete another of my outdoor dildo deep-throat challenges. This time our objective was to have me perform in front of the 'Gherkin' building in London's financial heart. Personally i think the building looks more like a dildo than a gherkin - but then i guess my mind is wired slightly differently than some of my fellow citizens of this great city. Anyway, enough of my ramblings here you can see how i got on:

the Gherkin - or is it a dildo?

i say, what is that person doing?

oh i see, enjoying a big cock

Our photographic mission completed we then retired to one of our favourite hostelries for a couple of drinks and to people watch (one of our favourite activities) and gossip.

This morning saw me being tied up naked to a chair in our lounge wearing nothing except a pair of red heeled shoes. Owner then proceeded to abuse my titties and my unlocked clitty, using the latter as a sex toy to pleasure Herself with after first having delivered 30 spankings to my exposed 'bits' for the pleasure of being allowed to sniff Her used and aromatic knickers. Having satiated Her desires and left me with aching bits Owner then did something i have long fantasised about, we have often discussed but never, until now done. Yes, Owner had me swallow Her delicious urine - or more specifically She peed into a plastic bottle and then squirted some of the contents into my mouth, after i had swallowed the first, mouthful She then filled my mouth up again and then again for one final time.

i loved having the opportunity to be allowed to drink Owners wonderful wine and She seemed to equally enjoy having me drink from Her 'cup'. After providing me with Her light refreshments Owner then tightly bound my clitty and teased and caressed it before then permitting me to cum like a slut as i sat helplessly tied in the chair. It was a really wonderful way to start our Sunday. Here are a couple of photos.

Of Travels and Tattoos

Owner and i have just returned from our short trip to Munich and Bavaria. We both had a great time and i ate lots of sausages and we both enjoyed 'sampling' the local beer :). We were both quite impressed by Munich and also enjoyed a trip out to Hohenschwangua to see Hohenschwangua and Neuschwanstein castles.

Of course, there was also time for a small amount of posing by me on the trip as well (although we both completely forgot to have me wear my princess crown when we visited the castles - only remembering on the way back when it was too late). Anyway, you can see a selection of photos from the trip below.

First some 'tourist' shots:

Marienplatz - Central Munich

English Garden - Central Munich

Petersplatz - Central Munich

Inside The Residenz - Central Munich

Hohenschwangua Castle

Neuschwanstein Castle

Then of me posing

Trying to look 'elegant' in the Residenz

Posing like a tart

Showing off my new 'Kiss Me Deadly' cincher - one of my birthday presents from Owner

We returned early this week and i was then lucky enough to be able to get the tattoo done that Owner had chosen for me for my birthday present. We are both really thrilled with it . The tattoo was done at Tattoo A Go Go near Liverpool Street station in London and i would recommend it to others. It obviously still needs to heal but this is what it looked like a few hours after the tattooist had finished her work

just after removing the protective wrap - you can see the pink infill on the design more clearly on this picture

tattoo close-up though the pink is less obvious in this photo

As Owner says, i now have my own princesses crown! We're both really pleased with the result.

Fun Things To Do In the City - Fellate a Dildo

On Sunday Owner and i paid a visit to Canary Wharf in London's docklands to do a spot of shopping and also provide an opportunity for me to complete one of the public challenges She has set me, namely to 'complete a deep-throat photographic challenge somewhere in Canary Wharf'. This post is just a quick update to show how i got on.

After stopping first for a spot of light refreshments;

It was then time to move onto the main task in hand, namely me being photographed with a nice big artificial cock in my mouth.

It proved to be quite an entertaining exercise as we sought to snatch opportunities in between the passing pedestrians and cyclists for me to demonstrate what a cock-sucking little slut i am. You can judge for yourself how i got on in the pictures below but Owner announced that She was pleased with how i got on;

looking a little nervous as i prepare to start

forcing that cock in as the wind blows

mmm...cock!

i have a couple more such public cock sucking challenges that i need to complete for Owner, i can't wait!

Challenge completed we then headed back home but not before spending a bit of time having fun with some of the interactive audio-visual art installations that have been set-up at Canary Wharf. Essentially, they allow you to interact with the work to create your own work. This is me interacting with one of the installations

Owners Surprise for Her Ageing 'princess'

This morning Owner sprang a wonderful surprise on me. Next week marks my 45th birthday and Owner and i will be celebrating it with a little trip to Munich and Bavaria. However, Owner suddenly announced that She had three additional ideas for presents for me and that i had to choose which one i would like.

Owners' first suggestion was for me to be taken out to dinner by Her to somewhere special, Her second that She book us both into a night at a hotel somewhere in London or nearby and Her third was that She get me a new tattoo. i confess that Owner hadn't even finished saying the word 'tattoo' when i already knew that was what i would most like. i currently have five tattoos, three of which were all done in the nearly ten years we have been together and which are all designs She chose, each of which is symbolic of an aspect of our relationship.On one hip i have an old-fashioned 'skeleton' key - which symbolises my chastity and Owners control, on the opposite hip i have a serpent which forms the shape of the initial of Owners first name and on my shoulder i have a large cat (no it is not a reference to the size if my 'pussy'!) which symbolises my status as Owners 'pet' - or Her 'fluffy pet' to be more precises! i instantly leapt at the opportunity to acquire an additional mark of Her choosing.

Recently, Owner has taken to describing and calling me as Her 'princess' - something which is very flattering. Owners choice of the new tattoo i will be getting reflects this perfectly in that She has chosen a princess crown design for me to have done on my ankle. The crown is even pink! You can see the design She has chosen below;

i am really thrilled and excited at the prospect of soon being adorned by my very own princess crown! i think this is such a wonderful idea for  a design and i cannot wait to be able to be once again permanently marked by Owner and with a design that so perfectly encapsulates who i have become. We have already contacted the tattoo parlor and hopefully i will be getting inked the week after next.

Why leave it until the week after next i hear you ask? Well, next week we are heading off to Munich for my birthday. Whilst we are there we will also hopefully pay a visit to the fairytale castle created by King Ludvig II of Bavaria - Schloss Neuschwanstein

This is the castle which Disney famously modeled his sleeping beauty castle on, in that sense it is a castle perfectly suited for a princess. i couldn't think of a more appropriate place to go :)

i love the fact that Owner thinks of me as being Her 'princess' as well as Her 'slut' or Her 'whore' and i can't wait to be able to show the world what a little (ageing) pink princess i am!

New Year, New Challenges

Owner has hit upon a great idea for an activity that we can both do together and which will also help to trim my waist (which has expanded a little). i confess it is not something i would have ever thought of before but as soon as She mentioned it it got me very excited - primarily at the thought of what outfit i might be able to wear! So what is this activity you ask? Well, hopefully in the not too distant future we will both be enrolling in Hula Hoop classes! Apparently, Owner used to hula quite a bit as a child. i remember giving it a go once or twice but don't recall ever having my own hoops whereas Owner did. Hopefully it will also help to trim down my waistline a bit which, as you can see from this picture Owner took yesterday of me just after my shower, needs some work to get rid of my 'love handles':)

Hopefully, hula will do the trick. i will update how we get on.

Yesterday also presented an opportunity to complete one of my dildo challenges that Owner has set me as part of my development. The challenge is that before the 1st April i must deep-throat  dildo in a number of public locations, some inside, some outside. Well, yesterday i attempted the deep-throat in a pub toilet challenge. At first i was a little shy and just fellated the dildo in the cubicle that i was in (if you are regularly kept in chastity as i am you will know that you can only pee sitting down - hence needing to use a cubicle as that is where the proper toilets are)

deep-throating in the toilet cubicle

However, i realised that that wasn't exactly a difficult challenge as, locked inside the cubicle there was no real risk of being disturbed. Far more challenging would be to deep-throat the dildo in the main urinal area where anyone could walk in at any moment. So i plucked up the courage, left the safety of the cubicle and pleasured the dildo in public like a slut

On returning to Owner with the photographic evidence She declared Herself pleased with my efforts and we returned to the main task at hand, gossipping and people watching in the pub.

The next dildo challenges will be less easy as, with the exception of one in a shop changing room, the rest are all outdoors or in front of one or two London landmarks.

Happy New Year - We Had a Fun Night Out

First let me wish everyone a very happy, kinky and prosperous 2015. i hope that all of your dreams and fantasies may come true and that this year is a truly special one for you all. Owner and i had a really terrific New Years eve which culminated in me draped across a car in central London with my skirt hitched up and flashing my panties

and that was before midnight! New Years Day morning was spent, in part, with me bent over a hotel bed whilst Owner fucked me with Her strapon. Yep, it has definitely been a New Year to remember :)

As we had both had to spend Xmas apart this year we were determined to ensure we spent New Years Eve together. However, we also decided that a bit of decadence might be in order and so we booked ourselves into a hotel in Central London (rather than spend the night in our flat in London) next to the Barbican. Our plan for the evening was to have a drink and a meal in an adjoining gastro-pub, then go the the Barbican to watch their Viennese New Years eve (Strauss inspired) concert and then have a little late night fun.

As we were going to a concert i opted to wear a new blouse and jacket that i hadn't yet found an occasion to wear. The bra i was wearing had a pink bow on the front which the blouse occasionally 'flashed' during the evening. The following are some pictures Owner took in the pub and then at the concert;

propping up the bar

the bow of my bra saying hello

and me flashing my bra's bow

The concert was excellent and was one i would definitely recommend to others spending a New Years eve in London (they also do one on New Years day).

Concert over we headed back to the hotel where Owner organised a little photoshoot of me in our hotel room;

However, this was just he prelude to he 'main event'. My special News Years eve treat from Owner was the opportunity to wear and pose in the same outfit in the streets next to the Barbican centre in central London. i was nervous and thrilled as, though i am an exhibitionist i can also get a little shy at times. However, we were both really pleased with the outcome. Owner took some photos and also a short video of my little night-time 'reveal'.

all set and ready to head down to reception

posing in the street

being my exhibitionist self

It was wonderful and left me quite excited, though i think i need to practice my 'sexy' walk a bit! :)

The following morning after breakfast was a truly wonderful start to the New Year. Owner started to caress and play with me and then, after making sure that She had made them suitably moist and aromatic, She removed Her knickers and placed them over my head so that the pungent crutch was right over my nose. One of Owners new rules is that i will now always receive 30 strikes on my clitty whenever i am permitted by Her to sniff Her used panties. Over Christmas She bought a wonderful leather fly-swat which is ideal for such a purpose. She then spent time tormenting my titties and spanking my exposed (and un-chastised) clitty with Her new toy.

After delivering Her thirty strikes to my bits Owner then strapped Herself into Her big red vibrating 8inch strapon cock and had me fellate it for Her as She watched before then turning around and presenting Her glorious arsehole to me for me to lick and probe with my tongue. Only once i had properly explored and tasted Her did Sh instruct me to stop and bend across the bed where She then slipped Her cock into my pussy, switched on the vibrations and fucked me hard until She came. After climaxing Herself Owner then continued to fuck my pussy whilst She reached around and began to masturbate my little clitty. Of course, it wasn't long before i too was at the point of no return and Owner graciously permitted me to 'cum like a whore' - which of course i immediately did!

As you can see, it was a wonderful end to the old year and start to the new. i know that Owner expects much of me this year as i endeavour to continue to develop and grow as Her ideal slut and wife. Later this year we will also celebrate our tenth anniversary together. i can think of no one on earth whom i would rather spend my life with than Her.