Sometimes it is only when you look back that you see how far you have travelled. It is certainly the case that with Owner and i, and specifically with the nature of our Female-led relationship and my submission to Her, we have indeed journeyed a long way.
Anyone who has followed this little blog of ours over the years will know by now that our story began just over twelve years ago when we met each other for the first time online. We were both emerging out of divorces and looking for new friends and companions. Neither of us was looking for romance. After getting to know one another in cyberspace we met for the first time in May 2005 at Bond Street tube station and went for lunch to a pizza restaurant, we still go to that same restaurant on the same day every year. For months we were 'just friends' until one day in October that same year Owner, bored of waiting, kissed me in London's Charing Cross station. We have been together ever since.
However, at first ours was very vanilla relationship. That changed when i nervously wrote Owner a letter inviting Owner to move in with me and asking to be allowed to submit to Her and for Her to dominate me (or words to that affect). To my delight She said yes.
Those first few years we played a lot and tried many different approaches before we found an approach that worked for us as a couple whereby i could truly began to fully submit to Owner. In those same years we also started to experiment with 'forced feminisation'. Once opened that particular Pandora proved impossible to go back into its box, and i am eternally thankful to Owner that She took my 'unlocked' femininity in Her stride.
We are now in a place where i live my life in a way that i could never have dreamt would be possible all those years ago and we do so in a way that is not a game that we dip in and out of, we live this 24/7 365 days a year. Owner is not your fantasy dominant wielding a whip and wearing heels. She is most likely to be found at home in a pair of tracksuit bottoms and slippers and spending Her time reading or researching something or other whilst i try to busy myself around the flat. If there was a live webcam of us it would most likely be as thrilling as watching paint dry much of the time, we live much as i imagine many other couples do, except that Owner is 100% in charge.
So what, you might ask, does that mean? Well, in case you are reading this blog looking for ideas of how you too could submit to your better half and what such a relationship might practically consist of (as we both spent years researching ourselves online and in forums when we first set out) then here are some examples of what my submission to Owner and Her domination of me looks like on a daily basis;
- i prepare all our meals (breakfast, lunch and dinner), i bake and i try to offer Owner meal choices - incidentally Owner is a great cook and She does occasionally cook
- i am responsible for all grocery and household shopping and for ensuring we are fully provisioned and keep a track of what needs using/replacing (i do not always get this right and am punished if and when i cock-up)
- i do all the household cleaning (i have a daily rota), clothes washing and ironing etc
- i am encouraged to learn new and practical skills and sometimes get sent on courses to learn - for examples so far courses i have completed have included massage, manicure, flower arranging, knitting etc
- the flat is decorated etc entirely according to Owners taste, we disposed of the things i once owned and i no longer have any possessions
- i may only purchase clothes that Owner approves of, must seek Her approval for what i can wear on weekdays and She chooses what i wear at weekends
- Owner controls my finances. i still have my own bank account but need Her permission to use that bank card, instead i have a separate account in which my monthly allowance of £100 is transferred - this is to cover my monthly costs (minus travel which is not included)
- i have no say in what i eat when we go out, Owner chooses my meals for me and will tell me whether or not i am permitted an alcoholic drink
- my social media access is restricted to stop me time wasting
- i am encouraged to use my free time constructively i.e. to learn new skills, practice my Spanish (Owner is Spanish) etc
- i must never under any circumstances initiate sex, my role is that of Owners sex toy to be used if and when She chooses.
- Owner and i last had 'tradional' i.e. me penetrating Her sex, over eight years ago. She can and does penetrate me and is in control of whether or not i am permitted to orgasm. i last orgasmed over 8 months ago and am regularly locked in chastity, this year i have been locked without release since the 10th January.
- i have been collared for most of our time together, i wear a metal 'public' collar all day (including at work) and at home also wear a leather collar and cuffs connected by a chain.
- Owner has supported my feminisation and i have been allowed to become increasingly feminine over the years. i now wear make-up daily (including to work) my wardrobe is entirely made-up of women's clothes and i am allowed to wear a bra, including a padded bra, on certain days
- i have a 'smock uniform' that i am expected to wear at home when cleaning, when i work from home i dress like a slightly saucy female secretary and can dress more illiberally for 'dress down Fridays' when i work from home. i am now accustomed to taking deliveries, talking to our neighbour etc wearing stockings and skirts (whether they are or not is another matter!)
- Owner makes all decisions. She decides where and when we go on holiday, what furniture we need, what we will do for the weekend etc. She does, however, expect and encourage me to provide Her with suggestions but the actual decision is Hers alone.
So, as you can see, there are many and varied ways in which i submit to Owner and She dominates me. i am Her housewife and Her sex toy. ours is not a Femdom relationship we dip in and out of, it IS our relationship and we live it everyday. Yes, there are times when things slip-up or when life gets in the way, but i would say we have got to a point where Her domination and my submission is the norm and it covers all aspects of our life together.
None of this would be possible were it not for the fact that Owner and i are best friends and love each other deeply. Her domination and my submission is built from an already strong relationship where we talk and share and communicate openly with each other. It has strong foundations from which we are building a strong Femdom/FLR frame.
So, why have i entitled this post 'The View From The Foothills'? Because, ours is a journey and we keep evolving, strengthening and deepening Owners domination of me and my submission to Her. i hope, and we strive, to keep strenghtening it further. As a professional trainer in real life Owner knows that i can sometimes get carried away and have unrealistic hopes/fantasies about what might be possible for us. Her style is gradual, to slowly, incrementally change and increase so that i normalise and get used to a new reality before the screw tightens a little further. She is an expert and highly adept at knowing how to have me sustainably submit completely to Her in a way that becomes embedded and lasts. We have, i hope many, many more years of growth and development still ahead of us, there are beautiful mountain peaks i would one day long to scale, we have come a long way but there is much fun to be had on the path ahead.